Celtics 92 Heat 85

6 Thoughts

1) Good, spirited basketball game against a veteran Celtic team. Tough loss to take, because Miami did just about everything they hope to do: DWade ran the show with 27, 6 rebounds and 5 assists; Jermaine O'Neal had a double-double (14 and 10, albeit with 3 costly late missed free throws); Mike Beasley had one of his better games, with 18 and 7, and played the entire fourth quarter in which he had 11 and single-handedly dominated the early play to turn a 2 point deficit into a 5 point lead with Wade on the bench; and, Mario Chalmers was aggressive attacking the basket all night long.

2) What didn't they do? Have shooters make open shots. James Jones and Daequan Cook were a combined 1-11 (0-6 from three), many wide open, stationary looks off plays from Wade. Cook, especially, missed two daggers with the Heat up 5 midway through the quarter. When Ray Allen hit a three from the top for Boston with a minute to go to extend to an insurmountable 6 point lead, it was poetic justice. Make or miss league.

3) Why are the Celtics good? A commitment to defense, good size up front, savvy scorers in Allen and Pierce, and some spunky youth in Rondo and Perkins. But also - it is the attention to detail. Celtic leader Paul Pierce takes the big shots for Boston, handles the ball on the most crucial possessions, rebounds, has a cool scratchy voice, and shoots free throws like a man stepping out of a canoe in three feet of water. But he also is an incredibly savvy defensive player. Midway through the second quarter, Miami stole a Boston outlet pass and reset their offense, looking to attack quickly. With some Celtics too far downcourt to help, Pierce sagged into the middle to deter a drive by Wade, even though his man, James Jones, was spotting up opposite on the three point line. As Wade surveyed the defense, Jones drifted back and forth along the arc, looking to create an angle for a pass from Wade and an open look for three (which, on this night, he would have missed). As he did so, Pierce kept shooting back quick looks over his shoulder and shadowing his movements, providing just enough of a deterrent to make Wade think he couldn't get the ball over to his shooter. Eventually the rest of the Celtics got back on defense, and Pierce recovered to Jones. But it was a subtle moment that showed Pierce's commitment to winning basketball.

4) Interesting stat tonight: three Celtics, Rasheed Wallace, Kevin Garnett (with a killer 24 on 11-12 tonight), and Ray Allen, are amongst the top 7 in career NBA minutes played amongst active players. Also on the list, at just over 40,000 minutes: Shaquille O'Neal. Approximately 30,000 of them motionless, standing under the defensive basket, acquiring three second violations.

5) Okay, so Rasheed Wallace, he is easily my favorite current NBA player. Let's run down the checklist. Unstoppable postup game? Check (when he decides to use it). Ability at 6'11" to drift outside and nail a big three? Check. Led the league in technical fouls - by a mile - virtually every year he has played? Check. Got one tonight for arguing a non-foul call on a turnaround jumper. Scraggly facial hair? Check. Teammates always love him? Check. Does crazy dances in the pregame huddles? Check. Defensive stopper on the blocks? Check. Crazy white patch on the top of his head? Check. When frustrated in Portland, once said he didn't care what the team did with him "as long as they C.T.C? That's cut the check for you all that don't know." Check, check. Won a title in Detroit shortly after Plumber said it was a terrible trade by Detroit and that they could never win a title with Rasheed Wallace? Annnnnd, check, please. I mean, come on- he's doing it all. Now? Over this past weekend, now this. Take it away Rasheed:

"I got a technical tonight for saying Hedo Turkoglu is a flopper," Wallace told the Boston Herald. "Everyone knows officials try to keep games close and that they keep scouting reports on guys. Let the Golden Child (LeBron James) or the NBA Without Borders Guys (international players) do it, and it's fine and dandy."

"This game is watered down," Wallace continued. "It's watered down with all of that flopping (expletive). ... I just said that Turkoglu is a flopper. I didn't use no profanity, and Derrick Stafford gave me a tech. Ain't like it's the first time I said it. But everyone knows that he's a damn flopper. That's all that Turkoglu do. ... It's not like I dug my shoulder into him. He hits my shoulder on a pick and he goes, 'Oooh,' and he acted like I shot him."

NBA Without Border Guys!!! That's all that Turkoglu do!!!

6) We've tried to stay off of long-suffering Nets fan Plumber's case this year because his team is 0-16, and that's no fun for anyone. Also, he said that I had a carefully constructed facade of a guy that doesn't give an f--- to conceal the fact that underneath I really don't give an f---. Trying to get back in his good graces. Also, there's a good chance that he is right. Anyways, Plumber has spent much of his free time, and my work time and free time, complaining about Nets coach Lawrence Frank for the past...when was Lawrence Frank hired? Approximately around the time the Odyssey began? Feels like I've heard a lot of complaining...Anyways, today, with the Nets on the verge of tying the worst start to an NBA season (0-17), Lawrence Frank was finally fired. It's tough to follow Rasheed Wallce, but somebody has to do it. Plumber? Thoughts on the Frank firing?

"While I don't like to take pleasure in another's misfortune...actually, I do like to take pleasure in exactly that."

Bonus Thought) Finally, this is a preemptive comment, because someone is surely going to bring this up to me, and blame me for the bad karma. I feel terrible that four policemen in Washington, D.C. were shot and killed. Just because I don't like living in a right wing police state doesn't mean that I begrudge any policeman doing his best to live his life, and I certainly don't want any harm coming to them. And even I am appalled that the lead investigator on this case appears to be Dr. Dre. I mean, let's take this a little seriously...



Going out West this week, for four tough games. Trouble.

---------------------

Wizards 94 Heat 84

6 Thoughts

1) After stealing a win in Orlando Wednesday, the Heat gave one back tonight in Miami. Sometimes, over the course of 82 games, the other teams just plays harder than you play: Wizards had 16 offensive rebounds tonight, and won the overall battle of the boards 48-36. That was the game. We're exhausted - let's roll through it.

2) Any night young Wizards shooting guard Nick Young, averaging 4 points a game on the season, comes in and thoroughly outplays Heat superstar Dwyane Wade, scoring 22 points and holding Wade to 18 on 6-19 shooting, that's a problem for Miami. Wade took the majority of the night off - he's entitled - but couldn't gather himself for a strong finish, and didn't get enough help from his teammates.

3) Mike Beasley was okay, 14 points and 7 boards in 37 minutes. 8 of his points came in the first three minutes, though. Lacked impact. Wizards power forward Antawn Jamison, 24 points and 13 rebounds, is the perfect guy for Mike to emulate. Jamison is an undersized, marginally athletic power forward who relies on non-stop movement, an array of clever flip and scoop shots mixed in with an effective face up jumper, and a nose for the ball on the glass. Jamison has been successful in the league by utilizing his gifts: good hands and good shooting, and by understanding what constitutes a good shot. A good guy for Mike to study.

4) Interesting to watch Wizards star guard Gilbert Arenas, back this year after two years away for three knee surgeries, sit out the fourth quarter in favor of 5'5" dynamo Earl Boykins, who was incredibly effective and finished with 10 points and 9 assists in 21 minutes. Even more interesting, after a late Boykins lean-in jumper sealed the Heat's fate, leading to a Miami timeout, Arenas was the first Wizard off the bench to congratulate L'il Earl. Arenas, who always seems to be smiling, gets points for not sulking, and for cheering on his replacement.

5) Emcee Chalmers was aggressive again tonight, with 20 points on 8-15 shooting. It seems, though, that Mario only becomes aggressive when it becomes apparent that DWade is not inclined to be aggressive. It would nice to see Mario look to assert himself at all times, including when Wade is aggressive.

6) Thanksgiving wrap-up: brief dispute in the Dos International Headquarters today when the Captain revealed that not only does he not like cranberry sauce, he wouldn't even consider "soiling my turkey with it." Strong words. He took mild offense when someone - I don't want to say who - offered that his distaste for delicious cranberry sauce was "just dumb." That same person also threatened to eat lunch at the same time as The Captain every day for the next month, eating exclusively cranberry sauce to gross out The Captain, to which The Captain countered by threatening to eat Chinese food every day for lunch, to which the other person said he couldn't give a crud because who would eating Chinese food every day for a month hurt except the person doing the eating, since everyone knows Chinese food is disgusting. When The Captain pointed out that is exactly how he feels about cranberry sauce, the other person pointed out, "it's not the same at all, and that is still dumb." Happy Thanksgiving everybody!

Heat 99 Magic 98

Look, there are very few rules here at Dos Minutos, but one of them is: Any time the Heat win a game on the road on a last second goaltending dunk by the highly polarizing Michael Beasley against a team that was in the Finals last year, and the game is televised live in Scotland - we go eight thoughts instead of the traditional six! International style! You feel me? Let's go!

8 Thoughts

1) Jason Williams, the starting point guard on the Heat's '06 Championship team, took last year off, and returned this season as Orlando's backup. Forced in to a starting role with Jameer Nelson injured, Williams blistered the Heat all night long: 25 points, 4-6 threes. Stepped to the line up 1 with 9 seconds to go, missed a pair. Miami called timeout, struggled to get the ball inbounds at halfcourt, then got it to DWade on the move. Wade got to the foul line, pulled up for a floater that looked to be drifting slightly wide left...and out of nowhere, Supercool Mike Beasley went up over the cylinder, grabbed the ball, and dunked it through the hoop with a second to go. Ballgame. Orlando protested the blatantly illegal basket vociferously - even Jermaine O'Neal, running downcourt to celebrate, kept looking back nervously over his shoulder for the basket to be waived off. Get on the bus, get out of town...Not sweating the call: President Quentin Richardson, out again with the tweaked back and resplendent in velvet, and again the first one to Dwyane Wade to celebrate the win. Somehow President Q always finds Wade before anyone else - after viewing tonight's rousing finish, M.Minutos has suggested a "President Cam" for a dedicated look at just how many bodies Q has to throw out of the way to get to Wade first...

2) But we digress. Best win of the year for Miami, which found itself down 11 on the road to the deepest roster in basketball with 8 minutes to go and Wade floundering with only 8 points. Coach Spo went Defcon 1: he moved Wade to point guard, inserting James Jones and Cook as shooters, with Jermaino and Haslem up front. Wade is, easily, the best point guard in basketball - only Chris Paul is remotely in the discussion. He is an outstanding ballhandler and has flawless court vision. Playing the point also allows him to survey the defense from the top to get his own offense. On this night? 16-0 run in three minutes, part of a 16 point individual fourth quarter from Wade. Time and again he does things not to be believed. He can't play point guard full time because he'd be out of gas by Christmas - but when times are tight, it is generally Miami's best lineup...Good move tonight by Spo.

3) Just thought we should mention here that James Jones fouled out with 9 seconds to play, precipitating the two aforementioned missed Jason Williams free throws. When Mike Beasley checked back into the game to replace Jones, with the Heat needing a bucket to win, someone at Casa Dos might have said, "this kid will never f-ing make a shot in a spot like this." I could be wrong, but it sounded a lot like someone might have said that. And I'm pretty sure it wasn't Scotland's Faither, who has been pleading with Coach Spo to play Beas at the end of games for over a year now. Hey, if he had known it was going to be this easy, he probably would have played him. Yet another example of why I love Scotland...

4) Jermaine O'Neal. I'm not going to say he outplayed Magic superstar Dwight Howard; but he played much harder than Magic superstar Dwight Howard, and produced 13 points, 16 rebounds, and 2 blocks against Howard, who had 12, 16, and zero. A second quarter skirmish between the two, triggered by a Howard forearm shiver to Jermaino's chest, led to several minutes of "Tilt Jermaino," an alternate personality who voraciously pursues rebounds out of his area, and tries to drive the ball through Dwight Howard's considerable chest everytime he touches it. Surprisingly effective. As he stomped off the court with a minute to go in the half, "Tilt Jermaino" had a wild eyed smirk, bordering on psychotic. "That's a quiet look of contentment on Jermaine's face," opined Heat play-by-player Eric Reid, always one to take a "glass half-full" approach.

5) Okay, so we all remember last holiday season when former Heat forward Shawn "Bad Santa" Marion snapped at a girl to open the Christmas present he brought to her house as part of the Heat's community outreach program. Tonight's halftime featured a look at the Heat's annual Thanksgiving feast in Overtown, a poor section of Miami, always a highlight of any Heat fan's holiday season. Midway through the feast, Jermaino, engaged in a hotly contested game of Connect Four with a six year old girl, finally made his row, thrust his fists in the air and crowed, "I told you I am the champ at this!" Hey, these economically challenged six year old girls are never going to get anywhere if you coddle them. Later in the segment, Jermaino explained his perspective on the event, "anytime you can come out here and conversate with these people a little bit, that's a great thing." Just what I was thinking.

6) Same piece: not to get too wishy-washy, but Udonis Haslem demonstrated again why he is my favorite person who has ever played for the Heat. You could see him smiling, and taking the time to look each person who approached him right in the eye. He grew up in tough neighborhoods in Miami, and no player has ever been happier to win a title for his hometown than Udonis was is 2006...And he has been an absolute model citizen. Not only has Udonis never been in trouble, never complained about his role on the team, never caused any distraction of any kind - he's never even not played hard. Love UD.

7) Orlando came as close as you can get to a "whitewash" without getting it in the second quarter: four white guys (Redick, Gortat, Ryan Anderson, JWill), and one French black guy (Pietrus). A French black guy? Does that even really count as being black? It does? Mon Dieu - so close!

8) Okay, so The Captain and I are at Hooters last weekend watching Jimmy Johnson wrap up his fourth straight Nascar point championship, or whatever it is called - you know, car racing, the regular cars, not the little low ones with only one seat and your head out. So The Captain has a few too many cold ones and he is starting to get a little boorish - he hates Johnson, he likes Carl Edwards because he drinks milk and does a backflip off his car when he wins a race ("nothing wrong with a little flair," says The Cap). So this big redneck guy is like, Carl Edwards can't hold Johnson's jockstrap, but he is getting all technical, like, Don't you understand that Edwards can't drive with restrictor plates, and The Captain is like, Freak you. So eventually the redneck is like, Come say that to my face, so The Captain goes over to him, says, "Look, man, the fact that your mom and dad happened to conceive your pasty white ass on the hunk of soil known as the United States of America doesn't make you Luke Skywalker," grabs the guy's basket of wings, dumps it in his lap, turns on his heel, and leaves. My hero!

Heat 102 Hornets 101

6 Thoughts

1) The Heat break a three game losing streak with a tenuous win at home over New Orleans without their best player, point guard Chris Paul. If you want to make the playoffs, you can't lose home games to middling teams playing without their best player. Miami blew two double digit halftime leads, got down by 4 late, and clawed back to win. Now 8-5 - it wasn't pretty, but it's in the bank.

2) Former New York Knick coach, and current ABC announcer, Jeff Van Gundy like to say the NBA is a "make or miss" league. In the last minute of the game, Udonis Haslem made an open 12 foot baseline jumper - his signature shot - to tie the game at 100. Hornets rookie Marcus Thornton made just 1-2 free throws to give the Hornets a 1 point lead. Udonis then made a double clutch, leaning, legs-splayed, elbow jumper - off the glass - to put the Heat up one with 20 seconds to go. After a timeout, the Hornets cleared out the top and let their best player, power forward David West, go one-on-one with Jermaine O'Neal. West pulled up from 18, pump faked Jermaino part of the way by, leaned out to elude JO's effort to recover, and fired a miss off the rim - ball game. Make or miss league.

3) Speaking of the aforementioned Thornton, a rookie from LSU, he took the "I Hate What They Did To Me" performance - the phenomenon in which a player whom a team traded comes back and haunts his former team for the rest of his career - to a whole new level. Named, of course, after former Heat power forward Kurt Thomas, whom Miami traded after a promising rookie season for Jamal Mashburn. Thomas say out nearly two full years with a broken foot after the trade, only to emerge in the late 90s as a primary nemesis on the arch rival Knicks, announcing his arrival to town for one game by proclaiming "I hate what they did to me." Thomas is still playing, by the way, at the approximate age of 50 - one can only imagine it is to get one more shot in at the Heat some way, some how. In any case, Thornton was drafted by the Heat in the second round this past summer, specifically for New Orleans, who coveted him, and immediately swapped two future second round picks for him. He spent approximately seventy seconds in the Heat organization. And yet, here he was tonight, apparently hating what we did to him, scoring 24 points on 5-7 threes. Imagine what he would have done if they hadn't traded him until the next day.

4) Mario Chalmers strung together his second excellent game in a row after scoring a career high 30 Friday. Tonight it was 12 points on 5-8 shooting, with 9 assists against just 1 turnover. More importantly, he aggressively sought out plays, driving in the paint looking to finish or dish - it was no accident that Haslem's game winning jumpers both came off passes from Emcee after penetration. The Heat organization spent all summer defending Chalmers, and their decision not to pursue a veteran point guard to supplant him - before this weekend, that decision looked questionable at best. These last two games, Chalmers finally started to look like he may yet justify their confidence in him. He is quick, he is a good ballhandler, a good shooter, and a fairly solid decision maker. They need him - desperately - to make plays off the dribble, if only to give Dwyane Wade an occasional rest. Keep it going, Mario.

5) Chris Paul, sidelined by a sprained ankle, was resplendent in a houndstooth sport coat over a crisp white dress shirt on the Hornet bench. Look endorsed by Dos and O.Minutos, panned by M.Minutos, who is disinclined to like anything Paul does because she considers him "snerdy" - a specific combination of snide and nerdy (black guys only). Also warrants mentioning he once, with extreme petulance, punched an opponent in the breadbasket in college - during a game, on purpose. One of the highlights of that, or any other, college basketball season...

6) Okay, so someone wrote in to ask me: "what do you think about Oprah leaving her show?" What? Oprah still has a show? I must be missing, like, the last 22 seasons on DVD...

Raptors 120 Heat 113

Part 1

Somehow due to a technical snafu, we lost the first part of our post. To summarize briefly: Emcee Chalmers career high 30, Miami down 23 in second half, cut it to 1 with 3 minutes to go, Beasley good night, but couldn't finish huge play at rim down the stretch, Bosh best player on the court. That ought to do it.

Raptors 120 Heat 113 pt 2

4)cont.:






5) We've said it before, but any game involving Bennett Salvatore as a referee is bound to be bizarre - that how you get a game where one team is down 23 a minute into the third quarter, and down 4 6 minutes later. Miami and Toronto shot a combined 70 free throws - that's a lot of whistles. Bennettmania!

6) No jokes tonight. When you lose three in a row, no jokes, no booty calls, no nothing. We would like to mention that we got several complaints about our review of Sarah Palin's Goin' Rogue, which we found odd, since the review was positive in nature. One disgruntled reader asked repeatedly: "Why is that funny? I don't get it? Why is she talking in a black slave's voice?" That's a great point - I don't know. It just seemed funny. To me. Sometimes these things are subjective...

next game: Sunday vs. New Orleans, and if all goes well, future Miami Heat point guard Chris Paul.

-----------------------

Hawks 105 Heat 90

6 Thoughts

1) Ouch. Second night in a row. Just, ouch. Second night in a row a team was too long and too athletic. Don't know how this occurred to me, but every Heat starter is undersized for his position - and only Wade and Chalmers are plus athletes. That's disturbing. Ouch.

2) The Hawks, who vanquished the Heat in the playoffs last year, are flying, off to a very impressive 10-2 start. It is a talented group that has grown up together, suffered through tough times as youngsters, were considered wildly enigmatic, and now they have started to put it all together. Heat sideline reporter Jason Jackson asked the most enigmatic Hawk, Josh Smith, what the key to the hot start has been: "We have made a conscious decision that we are going to play defense every night." Okay! Good idea! By the way, this is Josh's sixth season!

3) Yes, where in the world is Dwyane Wade? Third straight poor - very poor - game for Dee Dub. 15 points on 6-18 shooting. On the road, against a good team - Miami has no chance if Wade scores 15 on 6-18. No chance. He seems tired and lifeless over the past week. I think Mike Beasley's poor play might be depressing him...

4) Okay, the Mike Beasley joke was just to make sure Faither was reading. Mike was pretty good tonight. Had the opportunity to play more minutes - Udonis Haslem out for a game or two as the result of a bad fall last night. Mike played 33 minutes - would have been more but he was saddled with foul difficulty. Tough matchup against Josh Smith, who is taller and far more athletic - and more experienced. Also, has consciously decided to play defense this season..Mike got the ball in the hoop: 21 points on 8-15, and grabbed 9 rebounds. Did a little better with his decision making - several times squared up to the basket, took a hard dribble or two, and shot the open shot. That should be his bread and butter right now. Let's just leave it at that. He wasn't perfect, but he got some stuff done.

5) Heat play-by-player Eric Reid seemed a little down due to the beatings the past two nights. Failed to finish stories with his usual panache. Late in the third quarter rookie referee Marat Kogut was caught on replay making a call. "He has a fascinating background, Tony," Eric advised his partner, Tony Fiorentino, "he was born in the Ukraine..." That was it. Quite a facinating background indeed. Okay!Let's cheer up! There's a book review coming up in # 6!

6) Okay, great, time for another book review: Been readin’ Goin’ Rogue by Sarah Palin. And I have to tell ya, it's pretty gosh darn interestin’. One of the most awesomest sections is when Sarah is tellin’ her husband Todd about thinkin’ about runnin’ for Vice President, and why she is havin’ such a hard time decidin’. Here’s a little piece of it:

“Lawz a-might-y, Pappy, I do declare, I’z jus’ cant decides what to do.”

“Uhhn.”

“Ol’ man McCain, he’s a sayin’ that’s wez can beats Obammy and Massa Biden, but I’z ain’t too sho. I do declarze iff’n I run, I wud be missin’ you and the younguns so powerfulz much.”

“Uhhn.”

“You knowz Bristol , she bin tomcattin’ aroun’ theze parts, tho’ I shorely do likes this Levi, he sho’ nuff seemz like a bright boy.”

“Uhhn.”

“Why, Pappy – so whatchu thinks?

“Uhhn.”

“Thankz, Pappy, youse right! I'z gon' do it!”

Powerful stuff! Can’t wait for Chapter 2!

Thunder 100 Heat 87

6 Thoughts

1) Beat down in Miami. You could see it coming after an atrocious performance and late escape against New Jersey on Saturday night. Oklahoma City looked long, athletic, quick, and energetic. Miami looked lethargic. Besides Dwyane Wade, who struggled through a 6-19, 22 point effort, Miami doesn't exactly overwhelm anyone physically. Tonight they looked outclassed athletically. They are 7-3 after 10 games, but it's a bit of a mirage - the schedule has been soft, and heavy on home games. With Wade healthy, they a .500 team, maybe slightly better - so they are bound to come back to earth some.

2) Second year Thunder point guard Russell Westbrook absolutely annihilated second year Heat point guard Mario Chalmers. Westbrook, bigger and stronger and as quick as Chalmers, harassed him all over the court, making it hard for Emcee to get Miami into their offense. On the other end, Westbrook bullied Chalmers with 24 points on 9-13 shooting. Westbrook has an especially abrasive personality - taunting, smirking, and swaggering; Chalmers is as mild-mannered a player as there is in the league. It felt like a night where Mario had to stand up for himself physically and emotionally - instead, he got punked.

3) I'm not even going to elaborate on it, except to say that the whole situation is about to get ugly, organizationally-speaking, but Mike Beasley somehow managed zero (0) rebounds in 23 minutes.

4) If there was any bright spot for the Heat tonight - and, really, there was only one - it was Daequan Cook finally starting to show some rhythm coming back from a mild shoulder injury. 17 second half points for Cook, 14 in the fourth quarter, with 4 threes. They desperately need shooting and scoring right now - Cook provided that throughout the first half last year before injuring the same shoulder, and it would be a huge boost if he consistently gives them same kind of shooting off the bench now that he is back.

5) Well, every year you know you are going to see something that you have never seen before. Early in this one, Thunder forward Jeff Green (one of Dos Minutos' Top Ten Least Favorite NBA Players) started a drive approximately 35 feet from the basket, careened slightly out of control, ran over a stunned and stationary Jermaine O'Neal - back from taking a day off against the lowly Nets - and earned an easy charging foul from official Ed Malloy, in perfect position under the basket. Except, young official Brian Forte came running in from nearly midcourt, forty feet from the collision, to call a block on Jermaino, claiming that he was inside the "no charge" line near the basket. Replays showed Jermaino was roughly a foot and a half outside the line - whatever, that happens - NBA officials make bizarrely incorrect calls all the time. Except in this case, there were two calls. The referees huddled, discussed the play, and then decided to assess fouls to both O'Neal and Green and have a jump ball at midcourt. I'm no referee - much like a po-lice, the job description is to make peoples' lives worse, and I'm not with it - but it seems like, out of any decision they could have arrived at, that was the one thing it couldn't be. One guy ran over another guy. Either the second guy was in position, or he wasn't - it's one play - it has to be either a block or a charge, it can't be both. If you want to say, "hey, we don't know - no fouls on anybody, and let's jump it up," fine. Everybody would be fine with that. But to give both guys a foul - that's the only thing it couldn't be, it's the only call you can't make there. On the other hand, it was the call that made the greatest amount of peoples' lives worse at that given moment. Also, the least competent. So I guess we should have expected it.

6) A sobering moment: RIP for Ken Ober, host of MTV’s classic cult 80s game show Remote Control, and a native of West Hartford, Connecticut, my hometown. Also had a starring role on the short-lived television series version of the movie Parenthood. Ken died far too young this week, at the age of 52, of unknown causes. I arrived in my office to a deluge of emails – okay, one, from my brother – informing me of his death. Ken spent more time behind the camera than in front of it as his career progressed, notably on fellow Remote Control alumnus Colin Quinn’s show Tough Crowd on Comedy Central. Most recently, Ken had been a writer and producer on Carlos Mencia’s show The Mind of Mencia, so suicide can’t be ruled out...

Next game: 2morrow, on the road in the Atl, against the hottest team in basketball, and last year's playoff opponent, the Atlanta Hawks. Trouble brewing...

-------------------

Heat 81 Nets 80

6 Thoughts

1) Well, that was bizarre...Miami came out against a horrendous 0-9 Nets team at home, dialed up the intensity to approximately zero, got one basket from Dwyane Wade in the entire second half...and won. Now 7-2, albeit against a soft schedule, with a lot of home games in there...It's tough times for these Nets, who were bad last year, traded their best player, Vince Carter, in the offseason, and are now playing with half their roster injured. Even I felt bad for them tonight, because they played hard, and should have won. Okay, I didn't feel bad. But they should have won.

2) Dwyane Wade's one second half basket? A game-winning three off an inbounds pass, down 2, with 4 seconds to go when the play began. Wade received the ball, took a step back, making it obvious he was going to try to line up a three to win instead of driving for a tie, bobbled the ball, picked it up off the floor, and drilled it with Net defender Trenton Hassell up in his airspace. .1 seconds left on the clock - ballgame. DWade was passive most of the second half as the Nets trapped him at every opportunity, and he was a willing passer, but mostly took the night off. If you can't take a night off against the Nets, when are you going to get any rest? Filled the stat line with 8 rebounds, 6 steals, 6 assists, and 2 blocks to go with his 22 points.

3) DWade's shot never would have been possible without an even more unlikely three pointer a couple of possessions earlier, a pivot-and-fake-three-times-without-moving-the-defender-oops-the-shot-clock-is-running-down-so-I-had-better-heave-it-up-there...and bank it in off the glass to tie the game by...who else - The President, Quentin Richardson. Q made 3-4 triples for 13 points, quite an explosion considering he hadn't scored a basket in two games. Also made the decisive inbounds pass to Wade - showing Coach Spo's confidence in his decision making - and looked like the happiest person in the building when Wade's three ended the game. He was the first person downcourt to leap-bump Wade - he is always the first person to Wade to congratulate him on anything. Hey, they are long-time friends, but Q's no dope - keep the superstar happy. Also, good moment in the post-game interview with Q when he referred to Nets second year player Chris Douglas-Roberts as "Douglas Robertson." Twice.

4) Okay, so our man Plumber - the biggest Nets fan we know...okay, the only Nets fan we know...okay, the only Nets fan - hates Nets coach Lawrence Frank with the intensity of a thousand suns. He has an absolute passion for breaking down every Frank move like a Christian fundamentalist taking apart the Qu-ran. Our take on L.Frank - at least on this night: mixed. Defensively, the Nets were great, they junked up their defenses by mixing zone with man-to-man, and containment presses to milk the Heat's shot clock on almost every possession. When you are undermanned like the Nets, you want as few possessions as possible in the game. They crowded Wade, and made him give the ball up. They are tough to play against because no other team in the league plays as much zone. While it isn't a recipe for long-term success, it does give them a chance to win. Offensively, not so great. Brooks Lopez, the tall, tall second year Nets center, looked great on postups all night long. Jermaine O'Neal missed the game with a bruised hip, so Lopez was guarded most of the night by Udonis Haslem and Joel Anthony - neither is more than 6'8", and Lopez was very successful inside against them. But he posted up so infrequently - he spent the majority of his night on the perimeter 20 feet from the basket. He is a nice shooter - but he's 7'2". Get him down in the post, make Miami double team him, let him kick out to shooters - let him make the other players on his team better. He ended up 8-18 from the floor, and I would guess he has 4 or 5 baskets right around the rim, which means he was like 3-13 from everywhere else. It didn't look like a well thought out offense. And they only scored 80 with Jermaino - Miami's best defender - out, so you know...

5) Udonis Haslem, out of his mind again. 28 points, 12 rebounds. 28 points tied a career high, set against...well, the New Jersey Nets. Miami native UD also pointed out after the game that although the Triple A arena is Dwyane's house, "it's my town." Love that UD.

6) Faither's not going to like this, but Mike Beasley: 3-17. How many times can one person receive a pass, dribble in to the paint where all the tall guys are, get a little off-balance and out of control, and twist some ridiculous shot with a minimal chance of going in up at the rim? 17 times - that's how many.

Next game: Tuesday against Kevin Durant and the Oklahoma City, ummm, Thunder? They're relatively new, I'm not too sure...Still shocked there is an NBA team in Oklahoma City, but glad because I am thinking West Palm could be next.

---------------------------

Cavaliers 111 Heat 104

6 Thoughts

1) Pretty entertaining game, both teams played hard, and pretty well. One of those nights Miami got down 7, stayed down 7. Could never get that one electric run to get them over the hump. That can happen against really good teams. It is a shame Cleveland had a game in Orlando last night - they came out like a team that definitively did not spend the previous evening on South Beach.

2) Unlike many NBA games, the most entertaining quarter was the first. Shaquille O'Neal returned to Miami, where he helped win a title then burned every bridge on his way out of town, received a smattering of boos, posted up Jermaine O'Neal, unloaded about a quart of sweat on Jermaino, and scored three hoops in the first 2 minutes. Moments later, sufficiently amped up, Shaq came steaming down the court in transition, received a drop pass from LeBron James, and ran over President Quentin Richardson like an eighteen wheeler blowing through a hot dog wrapper. On his back, clutching his chest, Q Rich waved off the guys trying to help him up - "I'm all right," he seemed to croak, but it was tough to hear him with a double collapsed lung. Finally hauled himself off the floor, and took a seat on the bench clutching an ice pack to his chest. Moments after that, Dwayne Wade took a defensive rebound, rolled up court, got to the free throw line, found no resistance, took one more dribble and suddenly elevated on 6' 10" Cavs power forward and professional irritant Anderson Varejo, who realized about a half second too late that Wade was going to try to flush it on him - ewwww, STINKY! Wade's dunk brought the crowd and the Heat bench leaping to their feet, most notably Quentin Richardson, who skillfully managed to clutch the ice bag to his chest with one hand. Two trips later, Varejo, a little stung, got in Wade's face and wouldn't leave, and the two of them ended up with double technicals after several heated moments of jawing. Finally, LeBron ended the quarter with a weaving, floating, 21 footer off a full court dribble with four seconds to go, to give the Cavs a 35-33 lead after one. Whew! Has the game ended there, I think we all would have been okay with that...

3) As time wound down, and LeBron drilled a back-breaking three in President Q's face with about a minute and a half to go, M.Minutos took it hard. "Anyone can win in November," she pointed out, referencing the championship tally for Wade and LeBron, which, updated to the moment to include this game, still stands at: Wade - 1 LeBron - 0. She said it, not me...

4) Cavs new starter at power forward, second year man J.J. Hickson was active, fluid, and athletic with a career high 18 in 31 minutes. Looks like a keeper. He and Mike Beasley did their best to not guard each other most of the night - Mike found his stroke and finished with 24 of his own, although he still made several questionable shot decisions on dribble drives. Had a long email exchange with Scottish fan Faither today - he thinks we here at Dos, as well as Coach Spo, are too hard on Mike. I love Mike. He's funny, he can shoot, he can dribble - did I mention that he can really, really shoot? But if you watched him against young J.J. Hickson, if you didn't know, you wouldn't be sure that Mike was the second pick and Hickson was a late first rounder. You just wouldn't - Mike is a little underathletic in that matchup, and not quite as long. The advantages Mike has over Hickson are more subtle than raw athleticism - he is a better shooter, and a better dribbler. But right now, Mike is struggling with when to shoot and when to dribble; and when he dribbles, when to pull it up and shoot; and when he shoots off the dribble, what shot to shoot. He's going to set some kind of international record for getting his shot blocked in a season - had two or three more tonight. That's the part he needs to figure out. I think he will - he is only 20. But I want to point out that I love him. And Faither, too, for that matter...

5) Cavs guard Delonte "Redz" West was inactive tonight after missing the team flight to Florida earlier in the week. Coach Mike Brown said that Delonte "is having a problem reaching a base level of accountability." What? Just because he was arrested this summer after a high speed chase on an interstate highway riding a custom retro-fitted three wheel motorcycle, carrying a guitar case, sans guitar, but filled with guns? Is that the standard we are using? Because that seems awfully strict.

6) Okay, time for a new segment, an idea that was suggested, although in slightly different format, by our other Scottish reader, my good friend Scott. Note: anytime anyone from Scotland tells me to do something, I'm doing it. Unless it's Gerard Butler. Anyways, the segment is called "Where in the World is Dwyane Wade?" In this segment we will be assessing where Dwyane Wade is. Not physically, mind you, but mentally, especially with an eye towards this summer's impending free agency. Tonight Dwyane Wade is in a vague state of frustration - he played a good but not great game, LeBron played a good but not great game, and Wade didn't get enough help at home to win. That can't feel good. Miami has a ton of cap room this off-season, so the plan is to convince Wade to re-sign, and also bring in another star to help him. Target # 1: tonight's visitor LeBron James. Prompted by his trip to South Florida, numerous articles have surfaced on ESPN.com over the past week pointing out that: 1) Wade and LeBron are friends; 2) They are the two best players in the league; 3) Miami can offer LeBron a ton of money - not as much as Cleveland, but more than other teams in states that have a state income tax; and, 4) Miami is the coolest city on earth. That being said, watching the game tonight, I estimate the chances of LeBron coming to Miami as a free agent at approximately zero percent. 1) LeBron and Wade each need their own team; 2) He's not leaving 25 million or so on the table; 3) I don't think he can speak Spanish; and most importantly, 4) He's LeBron. He can either be on the Cavaliers, his hometown team, or the Knicks, in the most important city on earth. That's it. And the Knicks are brutal, so that isn't happening. So Dwyane may be wishing that is going to happen, but it isn't going to happen - that's where Dwyane Wade is tonight.

Next game: Saturday, against loyal Dos reader Plumber's Nets. They are 0-8. That makes you nervous - never want to play a winless team, because you know that they are going to come with everything they have to get a W. And Miami will probably take them lightly, and end up in a dogfight. I expect the Nets to win handily - did I jinx them yet? In honor of Plumber, until then, all you Dos readers: keep it real.
-------------------

Heat 90 Wizards 76

6 Thoughts

1) The train rolls on for another night - Miami goes to 6-1. The least sexy way you can possibly win a basketball game is through defensive rotations - the art of leaving your man to go pick up an opponent who has beaten your teammate, along with the resultant scramble back to open shooters when the driver passes the ball elsewhere. But it's Miami's forte. Jermaine O'Neal and Quentin Richardson combined for just 6 points in 66 minutes, but they won the game with their attention to defensive detail. They forced Wizard star Gilbert Arenas in to a franchise record 12 turnovers, 10 in the second half alone, when the Wizards scored just 27 points.

2) Also helping the cause: Dwyane Wade, with an inefficient 41 (29 shots), but, jeez, somebody had to score. That's two wins over the Wizards in a week, and 81 points for Wade. Wizards shooting guard DeShawn Stevenson, he of the Kimbo Slice beard, and the Honest Abe tattoo on the throat...let's just say he is having as much success guarding Wade as he is with his grooming decisions.

3) Okay, this pains me to say, 'cause he's my guy and all, but right now Mike Beasley is having problems. He was terrible - terrible - in this game. Took the opening pass of the game at the top of the key, drove strong left, and flushed hard on Andray Blatche - but it was the last play he made all night. Finished with 15 points, but on only 6-17 shooting, and virtually all the hoops were easy finishes around the rim off passes from Wade. Got several bad shots blocked, and had a couple soft turnovers. Then, made a disastrous appearance postgame in the Sunsport Lounge with sideline reporter Jason Jackson. Last year he famously punctuated one performance in The Lounge by telling Jackson that "you can not lick your elbow," and then demonstrated how it was physically impossible. Tonight he asked for a different replay angle on his dunk, demonstrated the dance he likes to do after slamming, accidentally kicked something under the table, and generally seemed extremely unprofessional...Okay - he seemed immature...Okay - he seemed as high as a kite. This can't be good. What happened to the fire he came out with this season? Seems doused right now. I can tell you one thing: don't let him in the Sunsport Lounge anymore.

4) Mario Chalmers is stroking it at over 50% from the floor, and over 50% on threes right now, seven games in. Stay aggressive, Emcee.

5) I didn’t click on the link, but on MSN.com’s homepage today I saw an article titled, “How Do I Tell My Mother She Has a Moustache?” Umm, usually I just wait until we are making out, then I’ll jerk away, massage my own upper lip, and be, like, "Mom, you’re scratching the crap out of me.”

6) Okay, so we got a few emails about # 6 from last Friday. To quickly recap: after the game – an exhilarating blowout win over the Denver Nuggets - I decreed an automatic booty night any time the Heat beats an undefeated participant from either of the previous season’s conference finals. First of all, there are none of those teams left this season, so you can stop worrying about a repeat performance. One reader asked: “Was that real, did you really make a booty call?” Great question. I did. Everything in this blog is real. However, the one regret I have, besides sharing it with you people, was that M.Minutos went to bed while I was writing the blog and making the decree. Then, after posting the blog, I quickly went in there and handled my business – without telling her about the new decree - then we went to sleep. Which would have been great if she didn’t then wake up the next morning, read the blog, and realize the booty call was premeditated, and an automatic action triggered by the outcome of a professional basketball game. Oops. Advice to our married guy readers: never do that.

Next game: Thursday, against the Cavaliers. Most people will be focused on Wade and LeBron, but I am really looking forward to the O'Neal boys, Shaq and Jermaino, locking up in The Over The Hill Bowl Pt. I. Also, we plan to introduce a new segment that night titled "Where in the World is Dwyane Wade?" See you then.
---------------

Heat 96 Nuggets 88

6 Thoughts

1) So much of the NBA is timing. Denver came in to Miami in the middle of a long early season East coast road swing, got in to Miami - and South Beach - the day before the game, and was undefeated on the season at 5-0. Easy for them to take a night off. Which they did. And Miami drilled them - up 12 at halftime, up 26 in the third quarter, easy, easy win. Only a meaningless fourth quarter run by the Denver backups made the score look respectable. The Heat are off to a quick and surprising 5-1 start themselves. Things will always get tougher in the NBA - put the wins in the bank when you can...

2) Denver decided that Dwyane Wade was not going to beat them. They doubled him hard off of every pick-and-roll, and forced him to give the ball up. He had a quiet 22 on 6-17 shooting. But the attention paid to Wade opened up the court for everyone else. Jermaine O'Neal (18 on 8-11), Chalmers (16 on 6-9, 4-5 threes), Quentin Richardson (13), and Haslem (11), all found room and efficiently made open shots.

3) Q Rich again was fabulous. Had 9 more rebounds to go with his 13 points - that's 28 rebounds in the last three games for a guy who is 6'5", and who is defending the opponent's best perimeter scorer every night, regardless of position. Took Carmelo Anthony, the league's most fluid scorer, all night long, and made it more difficult than Melo's 30 on 12-22 would appear. Hounded him all night long - hounded. That Dan-Majerle-I-am-going-to-stand-chest-to-chest-with-you-in-your-airspace-every-time-you-touch-the-ball-all-night kind of defense. Impressive. Nuggets coach George Karl said it best before the game: "It looks like Q has re-dedicated himself to basketball." Nice early story.

4) Mike Beasley was brutal tonight. Exchanged several emails this week with Supercool's biggest European fan, Faither from Scotland, who has the only Scottish Heat blog in captivity. We'll put the link up in a day or two. He acknowledged that while Haslem is playing great (4th double-double of the season tonight - off the bench!), it is arguably more important for the Heat's future that Mike learns to play and finish games. Can't disagree. But Mike played his way off the court tonight - 7 points on 3-8 shooting, and only 3 boards in 31 minutes. Had two horrifically careless turnovers and, midway through a meaningless 4th quarter, let himself get bulldogged and posted under the rim by Nugget scrub Joey Graham, who finished, which enraged Coach Spo, who took an immediate timeout, and glared Beas to a seat on the bench for the rest of the night. Didn't look engaged for the first time all season. Discouraging evening for the man with the red braids.

5) We got a million emails from readers this week, especially some of our favorite readers. Good suggestions for music to listen to and review, ideas for blog features, etc. We are going to get to all of them. I mean, maybe. We will try. But it is great to get the suggestions, always, they always make me smile. We have the coolest readers. Sorry if that was gay. Keep sending the emails.

6) Okay - I have decreed that any night you tattoo an undefeated team that was in a conference finals last year, that's a booty night, so I have to bounce. But quickly, we had this week-long debate at Dos Headquarters on Al Pacino. Finally decided that the most cringe-worthy Pacino "performance" ever was in Sea of Love. He plays a cop with an edgy dark side who barks everything he says just like Al Pacino, and likes to ham it up in front of the camera, while Ellen Barkin plays a woman with a broken nose who is inexplicably so attracted to wrinkly, leather-skinned old guys like Pacino that she has to attack him like a mongoose in heat, much to all viewers' chagrin. Several times, by the way. If you find that movie sexy, boy, I don't what to tell you...Time to go - "M.Minutos, turn the bed down, I'm coming in for a landing like Pacino, hoo-ha!!"

Heat 93 Wizards 89

6 Thoughts

1) It was a grind, Miami didn't play well, but anytime you go on the road in the NBA, against a probable playoff team, and win - good night, no matter how you get there. Both teams on the second night of a back-to-back, and it showed - low energy. But you can never complain about 4-1 in the NBA. Doesn't matter who you played, or how you got it done...

2) Much of the night featured Dwyane Wade against Wizard superstar Gilbert Arenas, back, and seemingly quicker than ever, after two years of surgery and knee rehabilitation. Wade, for the second night in a row, seemed somewhat subdued, but on this night he subdued his way to 40 points, and a huge late block of a Caron Butler drive. Gilbert shot 15 free throws on his way to 32 points of his own, but had three straight bad possessions with 40 seconds to go: drive and miss, drive and short alley-oop attempt to Brendan Haywood which inadvertently hit the rim and went awry, drive and miss. With a Wade jumper, and two Haslem free throws at the other end, that was the game.

3) One potential explanation for why Arenas wore down late, and suffered through a tough 9-27 shooting night? The newest Presidential candidate, Quentin Richardson, hounded him throughout the second half. For a formerly roly-poly small forward to take the defensive assignment against the opponent's lightening quick point guard is unusual, impressive, and not a job for just anyone. That's why Q Rich is a Presidential candidate. Further, Q hit 5 of 7 threes, including a shot-clock-running-out-fling-from-my-hip late in the game that put the Heat up one. Q also seems to have appointed himself intermediary between DWade and the officials, often steering Wade away from confrontation during the several dozen times a game he challenges a call. Q Rich, boy, Q Rich!

4) Not faring so well in the back-to-back situation: Jermaine O'Neal. The gas tank was on empty. The wheels were flat. Bumper hanging off, driver's side window doesn't roll down. I'm saying he didn't have it. Only 4 points and 7 rebounds in 33 minutes. Did make a big jumper late, and let Brendan Haywood shove him into Gilbert Arenas' late drive, forcing a miss (and an odd no foul call) that decided the game. Let's get those knees on ice, Jermaino.

5) Quick check in on Mike "Supercool" Beasley. He's starting at the 4, but playing minutes at the 3 also, and generally not finishing games in favor of Udonis Haslem. Had 10 and 4 tonight in 24 minutes. He is finishing easy plays around the rim, and competing hard on the boards and defensively. His effort level is at a constant, solid 7 +, flashing 8 for spurts. This is a marked improvement on last year's solid 4, flashing an occasional 5. Noticeably lucid and engaged throughout the game, and always up and cheering on the bench. Good attitude out there. The offense isn't quite there yet - starting, he is now the third option to begin the game, behind postups from Jermaino, which Miami always looks to establish early, and Wade. Last year, coming off the bench, he was freer to fire at will. He can score 25 in his sleep if you turn him loose, so the offense will come. But the other stuff? So far, so good.

6) Okay, so here is my main thing about the po-lice. It is a point that I try to make to right-wing-police-state-loving The Captain all the time. How many times are you sitting around, enjoying yourself, and then you think: “You know what would really make this even more fun, just absolutely put this moment over the top? If the po-lice were here!” Never. That never, ever happens. And often it is worse.

A couple of weekends ago I was bringing P.Minutos to his 5 year old soccer game. The park where he plays soccer has multiple soccer and baseball fields, and woefully insufficient parking for busy days. On this particular Saturday, the lot was full up, by a mile. Old white-ish dads were racing around the lot in their 4-Runners trying to position themselves for the next available parking spot. People are cutting off other people, having arguments – the usual embarrassing suburban behavior. Meanwhile, little kids are scampering around the lot at the same time, going to and from their games. Totally unsafe.

I drive to the far end of the lot, far away from everything, and put my car up on a curb – there are approximately 100 cars parked around the lot in this manner. As I start to walk P.Minutos to his game, I see a sheriff’s car about 20 cars down from mine, and it is obvious he is just trolling the lot giving a ticket to everyone who is parked, technically, illegally. Unfortunately, this isn’t America, where you can just exercise good judgment and park so you aren’t blocking anyone in, obstructing any roads, etc. So I walk over to the sheriff and say, as politely as I can muster, “Hey, it seems really kind of unfair to give people who are bringing their kids to their soccer or baseball games parking tickets when there aren’t enough spots in the lot,” and he looks at me, shrugs, and says, “that’s not really my concern.” So I look at the guy and say, “I would think that it kind of is your concern, like the parking lot is very unsafe right now because people are driving all over like crazy people, and there are little kids around, and, like, I thought it was the job of the po-lice to keep people safe (I knew it wasn’t – that was a lie).” And, again, he is just, like, “whatever.” This kind of proves my original point: there are like a thousand people of all ages at this park having fun, not bothering anyone – and here comes the po-lice! Did they make it more fun, or less fun? Exactly…

So we go to the game. I am fuming because the po-lice are assholes. Oh, I forgot one part. After leaving the sheriff, walking towards the game, a very, very white dad looks at me, not knowing I just spoke to the sheriff, and says to me, trying to be helpful, “hey, be careful, they are ticketing people.” Too much to take – I told him, “good, because I will fuckin’ rip it up.” I know, it wasn’t even clever, nor did it make sense. Also, I told P.Minutos, “never talk like that to people.” So, there is a ticket on my car after the game, and on Monday I write a letter to the Clerk of the Court, disputing the ticket; to the Head Po-lice in Charge; and to my County Commissioner , whatever that is (The Captain had to explain to me that we have County Commissioners). I politely explained the situation. A couple of days later, someone from the County Commissioner's office called me to thank me for being such a great citizen because, when she did some digging, she found out what a big problem the parking over there is, and they are taking immediate specific steps to correct it, which she enumerated to me. She asked me “to keep an eye on it” for her, and to call her back next week to report how it went. I said I would, but I won’t, because: 1) soccer season is over, and 2) I’m not a po-lice, I don’t “keep an eye on things” and then report back to headquarters on it.

The sheriff’s department also called me, but didn’t reach me, and promised to call me back at some point this week, though I have not heard from them.

I feel great to have done my little part to help improve the parking at the soccer fields for white dads everywhere, and also, some Hispanic ones. As The Captain pointed out, I am “gettin’ it done.”

Suns 104 Heat 96

6 Thoughts

1) The undefeated dream is over for Miami. Blah loss. Dwyane Wade filled the stat sheet (23 points, 9 rebounds, 7 assists), but was mediocre and ineffectual. Suns point guard Steve Nash was brilliant with 30 points on 11-15 shooting, and 8 assists. That was much of it right there.

2) Miami's best player tonight: Quentin Richardson. Q-Rich for President! 4 triples on his way to 18 points and 10 rebounds. The formerly rotund Richardson is fitting in well as a jack-of-all-trades complementary player for the Heat. Announcer Eric Reid cited how his new body frame has really helped his game. Realistically, though, he probably has the same body frame, just less body fat. Either way, if he runs in 2012, I'm voting for him for President. Let's get a real black guy in there.

3) M.Minutos pointed out an ever increasing tendency of Heat color commentator Tony Fiorentino to let partner Eric Reid describe a situation, or tell a story, and then comment by essentially restating what Reid just said. Reid told a story about Suns forward Amare Stoudamire's recovery from surgery to re-attach his retina this offseason: "He couldn't do much of anything - for ten days he had to lie absolutely still, face-down on a table." Tony: "Eric, he really couldn't do anything after the surgery - he had to take it easy and stay motionless much of the time." Do you see what we are saying? He takes Reid's words, and then just re-decribes them in a different way. It's like he hears something, and then changes it slightly, saying essentially the same thing. He makes roughly the same point Eric made, just using different words. He regurgitates Reid's thoughts, but using some of his own words. I think you know what we are saying.

4) Tony also trash talked Suns center Channing Frye tonight when Frye objected to a second quarter foul call. The replay clearly showed Frye had committed a foul - "I don't know why he is acting so perplexed, Eric," crowed Tony. A quick live shot showed Frye still frowning on the bench - "He's still perplexed, Eric!"

5) Dos Minutos' fave Dirk writes in with a question: "Is M.Minutos okay with you sleeping with the undead?" Great question - thanks for asking. I think she is cool with it, and can relate, because she has been sleeping with my lifeless body for 15 years. Thank you, I'll be here all week!

6) The Captain also wrote in with a question, which is odd in itself since he spends approximately 25-40 hours a week sitting twelve feet away from me: "When you were in the throes of not giving a fuck, was the knit ski cap you were wearing the same Miami Heat knit ski cap you were wearing while hanging out with Mike Beasley in the infamous photo?" Another excellent question. The answer is yes, but I folded the bottom of the cap down to hide the Heat logo. Hard to be gansta-not-giving-a-fuck with a blazing basketball going through a hoop on your hat. And, yes, that is something I thought about consciously at the time.

Tomorrow night: road game against the Washington Wizards, and a Thought #6 story titled "Why I am a Great American," or, alternately, "Why the Po-lice are Always Assholes." See you then...
-----------

Heat 95 Bulls 87

6 Thoughts

1) Okay - first playoff team of the season Miami has played, and another win. As former Heat point guard Tim Hardaway used to say, this game was "nip and tuck." A reader pointed out that we didn't mention Tim had his uniform retired before the first game this season. Once again, I was shocked by the size of the actual uniform retired - it's a good 8 feet tall. I always assumed retired jerseys were normal-sized...

2) Battle tonight was between Chicago's superior length and athleticism, and Miami's more imposing physicality. Miami didn't have a true matchup for long Chicago small forward Luol Deng, who scored 26, but got double-doubles out of both Michael Beasley (10 and 11), and Udonis Haslem (19 and 11). UD continues to look unbelievably spry off Miami's bench.

3) Good night for two role players. Backup point guard Carlos Arroyo, from Puerto Rico and Florida International University, carried Miami for a significant second half stretch, finishing with 12 points in 16 minutes on 5 of 7 shooting. Also, Heat announcer Eric Reid pointed out that Carlos' jersey is now available at the Miami Heat team store. Starting small forward Quentin Richardson, who struggled to contain Deng, and had just one basket in Miami's first two games, knocked down the biggest shot of the game, a huge 3 off a Wade drive and kick with about a minute to go. During the ensuing timeout, Q danced around the court like he had won the Superbowl - act like you've made a shot before, Big Fella.

4) Someone wrote in to ask what the aforementioned Eric Reid, and his sidekick Tony Fiorentino have been up to in the first two games. Well, the usual: Eric's been analytical, efficient, and glad to be back in action. Did I mention he has only missed one Heat games in 22 plus years? Tony has been, as per usual, echoing my every comment, much to M.Minutos' distress. But tonight, an added element: a first quarter technical snafu led to Eric Reid's mic being shut off, and Tony's sounding like he was filing a satellite report from the field in Kabul. However, they didn't realize it, so there were long stretches of silence while Eric silently described the action - all we would hear was the follow-up spectral voice of Tony chiming in "you're right, Eric, this Bulls team is very active," which, after a while became creepy, because we couldn't hear Eric. Reid, every inch the professional, is sure to be fuming about the technical mix up: "We have one job to do, guys, and that is to bring the excitement of the Heat to South Florida - Goddammit, pick it up!"

5) White sneakers at home this year, instead of the usual black. The Heat look quicker. And Quentin Richardson needs the help.

6) Okay, someone else wrote in to ask what Halloween is like at Casa Dos. I am very, very glad you asked - that's a great question. First of all, completely having nothing to do with Halloween, I woke up on Saturday plagued by the sneaking suspicion that I just don't give a fuck. In a apathetic mood all day. O. and P. Minutos each had a friend coming over to trick-or-treat - which was my responsibility - while the moms hung out at Casa, passed out candy, and drank peach-mango wine coolers. The first mom who arrived noticed I was wearing a knit ski cap on an 85% degree day, leading to the following exchange:

"Why are you wearing that hat?"
"Because I just don't give a fuck."
"But you are still going to take the boys out trick-or-treating, right?"
"Sure, why not."
"Great!"

So I loaded up one of M.Minutos' giant aluminum traveling coffee cups with peach-mango wine cooler just to, you know, take the edge off a little, and took the kids out trick-or-treating. Only unpleasant incident occured when one of the boys' guests began kicking a door he felt was not opened quickly enough, elicting a lecture from the home's occupant, and a-full-quart-of-peach-mango-cooler shoulder shrug from me. Hey, he's not even my kid...Overall, I feel the night was a great success - Happy Halloween everybody!