6 Thoughts
1) You are in the middle game of a back-to-back-to-back, all on the road, in the cold, against a team off the night before, and you have already lost twice to them. The other team is over-physical, and loves nothing better to grind you, frustrate you, and fling wild triples into the basket at the offensive end. Then you immediately get down 8, because they beat you to a bunch of early loose balls. It is an easy game to give up, to say, "ahhh, whatever," and let it go. But on this night, KJ James and Dwyane Wade decided to grind themselves. And that consisted of them taking turns going to the post over and over. And over. And over. And scoring, and scoring, and scoring, until they had blown the Milwaukee Bucks out, rendered the fourth quarter meaningless for the second straight night, and received extra minutes of rest for the starters. Now Miami goes to Indiana tomorrow for the culmination of the "Cities We Would Never Want to Live In" tour, and has the opportunity to become the first NBA team this season to win three straight, on consecutive nights, on the road, a feat tempered in magnitude somewhat by the fact that most teams get at least one home game in their back-to-back-to-backs. Commissioner David Stern: still trying to give my dad, Pat Riley, the ten-foot pole!
2) Minutes. KJ James: 33. A ridiculous 16-21 from the floor for 35 points, and 8 rebounds. Everything was either a dunk, or a postup. He posted Ilyasova; he posted Delfino; he posted Mbah a Moute; he posted Steven Jackson; he posted everyone, and scored on all of them. That was dominant. Dwyane Wade: after 24 last night, a measured 28 tonight. 8-14 from the floor for 22 points, with 5 boards and 4 assists. Also scored repeatedly from the block, shooting turnarounds over his right shoulder, and little floaters over his left. He wasn't quite as dominant as KJ, but he was the second best player on the court by a mile. Bosh: 30. Chalmers: 22. Rest. To have any chance tomorrow night, rest was important.
3) You know what happens when KJ James and Dwyane Wade are posting over and over, scoring over and over? I mean, what happens on the possessions when they don't just score themselves? Open shooters. Mike Mil-lar: 3-4 triples. He's still over 50% on the season. He also grabbed 8 rebounds in 23 minutes. Emcee Chalmers: 3-4 triples. Chalmers has the highest true shooting percentage - essentially, aggregate points scored per shot - of any guard in the league! And the Heat dropped 114 on a good defensive team, in a fairly slow-paced game. That's absurd. Especially on the second night of a back-to-back.
4) Bucks wing Stephen Jackson, a notorious wack-a-doo, had a typically uneven night. He was 3-9 in 17 minutes, and spent much of his time getting scored on in the post by KJ James or Dwyane Wade, and what little time he wasn't doing that, arguing with the officials. Heat play-by-player Eric Reid lamented that Jackson, "hasn't learned any lessons in his twelve seasons in the league." Annnnd, that's where you're wrong, Eric Reid. I'm just taking a wild guess, but I feel pretty confident that Stephen Jackson altogether rejects your notion of his being a student in need of a "lesson," and would probably claim you need a lesson in "being Stephen Jackson." It's like when the white man came to America and tried to force Christianity on the natives - it's a conceit that presupposes that the native Americans have any idea what you are talking about whatsoever. Same's pretty much true with Stephen Jackson. This is what he's got, E. Reid. You're either with him, or against him.
5) A few minutes later, during the midst of a long, blowout-y fourth quarter, Eric enlightened Heat fans on a particular quirk of his broadcasting partner, Tony Fiorentino: every time they get to a hotel on the road, no matter how late at night, Tony picks out his shirt for the next game, gets out the iron board, and has at it. "This way it dries off and is ready to go the next day," explained Tony. Not sure how much water he is spraying on that shirt that it needs to dry overnight. Anyways, in an almost mind-boggling turn of events, Eric Reid, who on the surface appears to be one of the most fastidious and assiduously prepared human beings alive, lightly mocked Tony, laughing, and claiming, "I just pick out my shirt for the game ten minutes before it is time to get ready." HAAAAAAA!!! So impulsive!!! The chances that this has happened, even one time: 0.0 percent! I am willing to lay HUGE odds that Eric Reid has his wardrobe for the entire season picked out, color-coded, logged into a computer, and packed in a travel bag, two weeks before training camp even starts! This is a man who knows off the top of his head how many dunks KJ James has in February! This is a man who can recall the details of a December road win in Cleveland...in 1997! This is a man who got upset when he was awakened before his scheduled rising time, and thus thrown off schedule, by the "cacophonous roar" of a marathon race in Sacramento last year! He doesn't do anything without a minimum of six days of careful consideration! If this is the kind of lesson you want Stephen Jackson to learn, Mr. Reid - lying to seem a lot cooler than you are - than I suggest that Stephen Jackson find a new mentor!
6) You know JoJo the Tire Guy? From "Bad Boys?" You know, that guy in the commercials who wants to fight you over the brand of tequila you drink? He's like, "Whatever happened to men - they used to be men, now they are girls, and they don't sit around wearing terrible-looking dark suits, like mine, and berate people for the kind of tequila they do or don't like to drink." Yeah, well, whatever happened to him? He was such a nice, young kid, and in "Bad Boys" all he knew about was tires, only tires - oh yeah, and about major crystal meth dealers, but mostly tires. But in the end, he was straight, he told Will Smith and Martin Lawrence what they needed to know. Why is he douche-ing it up in these commercials now? He was on "The Sopranos," right? Was this his character in "The Sopranos," a guy who liked to fight people who didn't drink the same tequila he did? Man, that really, really, really seems like a show I would not enjoy whatsoever...
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Back - again - tomorrow night in Indiana. If they win three in a row on the road, that's a fairly ridiculous feat. We'll see what happens. If you need me before then, I'll be drinking passion fruit mojitos. YEAH, COME ON, JOJO THE TIRE GUY, I'M NOT SCARED OF YOU, I'LL DRINK FRUITY GIRL DRINKS ALL I WANT, YOU LITTLE BLACK SUIT-WEARING SELLOUT! I'M STANDING RIGHT HERE, PUNK!!!
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