6 Thoughts
1) Dwwwyyyyyyaaaannnnnneeeee Waaaaaaaaaaaaadddddeee!!!!!!!!! He made jumpers! He made runners! He made floaters! He even made free throws! 41 points on 17-25 from the floor, 10 rebounds - this was 2006 Finals MVP Dwyane Wade. He: Took. The. Pacers. Apart. Then gave the game ball to suspended Udonis Haslem (who hit Hansbrough for hitting Wade) on the plane ride home. See ya, Pacers, yeahhh boyyy! This series is over! O-V-E-R!!! Let's Go!
2) Dwyane Wade dominated this game in every way a game can be dominated. But two role players stepped up and helped with huge plays of their own, especially in the third quarter when Miami turned a 2 point halftime deficit into a 10 point lead after three. Mario "Emcee" Chalmers hit back-to-back threes early in the quarter, then fouled George Hill on a three, but jinxed him into missing 2 of the 3 free throws. Then, in the final minute, up 4, Mike Mil-lar, who made 3 triples in the first half, caught a hit ahead pass in transition and drilled a 25 footer to go up 7, Miami got a defensive stop, then came back down, KJ James drove, drew defenders, then spit to Emcee, who knocked down his third triple of the quarter at the buzzer to put Miami up 10. Chalmers made 3-4 threes for 15 points and 0 - zero! - turnovers, and Miller made 4-7 for 12. Mil-lar's performance is made even more special by the fact that he can barely walk - watching him hobble up and down the court makes me groan.
3) In the series KJ James averaged 30 points per game on 50% shooting from the floor, 11 rebounds, 6 assists, and about 3 steals. He was completely phenomenal on both ends of the floor. I thought tonight he kind of breezed through the game expending only what effort he had to, which wasn't much since Wade was eviscerating the Pacers defense, but he still ended up with a 28-6-7 night, and put the game in the cooler with an unbelievable finish through a rough David West foul in the final moments, which, of course, went uncalled (welcome to KJ's life)...Meanwhile, the guy KJ took apart on the offensive end, Danny Granger, who talked, and talked, and talked, and talked, then removed himself from Game 5 when it started to get too physical, then talked, and talked, and talked, paused briefly to plead with the NBA to suspend UD for this game, then talked, and talked, and talked some more, averaged 13 points per game on 38% shooting, and "grabbed" 4.5 rebounds per night. I think he is supposed to be the Pacers best player. He was terrible, he got humiliated in this series. I'd like to think he learned a lesson, but I suspect he didn't...and talked, and talked, and talked, and talked...Still talking...
4) Play of the game: with Indiana desperately trying to stay in the game in the fourth quarter, a couple of bad Heat offensive possessions allowed the Pacers to claw from double digits down to within 5 with 8 minutes to go. Another bad set saw Shane Battier catch the ball late in the shot clock behind the three point line, fake a shot, then drive down the lane (slowly, but still driving), draw defenders, then slip a crafty little pass to a cutting Joel Anthony who somehow snatched the ball with the two sticks of butter he calls hands and layed it in the basket as he was getting fouled by both Danny Granger and Roy Hibbert: three point play! Crisis averted! Ballgame! Just how we drew it up! Next, we are going to install some dribble handoff actions between Shane and Joel, and maybe let them play together at the guard spots a little bit! Their talents have been under-utilized! Battioke off-the-dribble to Joel - Good Lord!
5) Ahhh, that's a shame, Pacers. They had a 2-1 lead in the series, and a 10 point halftime lead at home in Game 4, and somehow got beat badly three straight times, twice at home, tonight against a team missing two starters, to lose the series. That's fairly pitiful. Yet, never thought to shut the hell up a little, even after the series ended. David West: "The series was there for the taking. I just felt we got back on our heels the last three games." The last three games? The series was only six games long! You thought you should have won a series in which you played poorly in 3 of the 6 games? That's odd. West had a great offensive game tonight, but was again a huge problem for the Pacers defensively because he is either unable or unwilling to defend a pick-and-roll properly - he kept turning Wade loose to the paint, giving him a free run at the slow-footed Roy Hibbert. West scored 24, but he may have given up 34 - he's a very poor defensive player...Pacers coach, and noted liar, Frank Vogel: "I think we could have beat these guys if we had played our best, but we didn't play our best." Genius. "If we never, ever turned the ball over, and every shot we took went in, and every single shot Miami took missed and we secured the ensuing rebound, we definitely win this series." I also liked that Granger and West, who mean-mugged all series long at Heat players, then when Udonis flattened Hansbrough like a buttermilk pancake in Game 5, neither one of them ever went near UD, both left the court without shaking hands after the series ended. Class acts, those two, Jesus, grow up.
6) Link to Yahoo article online today: "Cell phone users like Obama; landline users prefer Romney." What? You have to be kidding me! What were the odds that cell phones users would prefer Obama, while folks who still use landlines would favor Romney? 100%, or only 99.9%? Here are some links to other Yahoo political polling articles from the past year or so:
"Guys who wear pleated dress slacks likely to power Romney effort in northeast."
"Voters who have at least even heard of an Ipad prefer Obama over Gingrich."
"Owners of above-ground pools would vote for Huckabee if he entered race."
"Men with overbearing female bosses are not big fans of Hilary Clinton, prefer anybody else on earth."
"North Florida man with hunting permit votes for Obama, but turns out it was a mistake."
"Biden supporters most likely to be alcoholics."
"Evening news watchers say Romney's their man."
"Gays love Obama; think Santorum is 'a douche.'"
"Lovers of fake pizza chains still believe Cain is electable."
"Obama slips ahead of Romney in crucial 'black guys who wear cardigan sweaters' demographic."
"No correlation found between voters with abnormally low i.q. scores and Michelle Bachman...yet."
"Guantanamo Bay prisoners again turn out overwhelmingly for Biden."
"Ron Paul widens lead with registered Republican college students who own bongs."
"Alaska and the Dakotas still major strongholds of Palin support."
"Indiana Pacers head coach Frank Vogel claims Obama approached him as potential V.P. replacement for Biden."
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We have a few nights off now - the Eastern Conference Finals will begin Monday night in Miami against the Boston Celtics. I mean there is absolutely NO WAY the Celtics could possibly lose Game 7 on their home floor Saturday night to Elton Brand and the lowly Philadelphia Sixers! That's impossible - that would be the biggest upset in the history of basketball! It's positively unthinkable! Celtics it is: this playoff run just got a whole lot douchier! We'll see you on Monday night. If you need me before then, I'll be showing O.Minutos film of Davd West trying to guard pick-and-rolls in this series: "O.Minutos, whatever you do, never do this!" Happy long weekend, jackapples!
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