6 Thoughts
1) Look, this is how the NBA goes: if you get ahead 2-0 in a playoff series by winning the first two on your home floor, you aren't winning Game 3. You just aren't. Your energy is going to be a touch down. The other team's energy is going to be sky high - their whole season is on the line. The NBA's going to give you an inexperienced refereeing crew that's more likely than not to be swayed by the home crowd, and the other team's head coach is going to complain about the officiating publicly in between games. In this case, the unbelievably whiny Doctor Rivers has been complaining about Dwyane Wade and KJ James getting "star treatment!" Your team has Ray Allen, Kevin Garnett, Rajon Rondo, and Paul Pierce, and you are complaining about Miami getting "star treatment" - really? That's the most plausible theory you can come up with? None of this is new, none of this is a complaint - the Heat have benefitted from this plenty of times, too. And nobody is immune to it - the Spurs hadn't lost a game since, like, the Eisenhower administration, beat OKC the first two games of their series in San Antonio, then lost Game 3 in OKC last night by like 100 points. It is what it is. All you can do is get your mind right, bring it for Game 4 - by then you're a little more acclimated (hopefully), you can sort of recalibrate your energy level, and adjust for the home calls the other side is going to get. This is what makes it good, this is why the playoffs are exciting - nothing's easy. This game could have spoiled M.Minutos' 40th birthday, but she's been around a minute, she knew what to expect, she shrugged it right off...Let's go...
2) The Heat were down 24 in this game in the fourth quarter. Just one of those nights. I would have waived the white flag, but not Coach Spo. He went ultra-small (Chalmers, Battier, Wade, Mil-lar, KJ James) and tried to fight back into the game. Mil-lar made back-to-back triples, James (16-26 for 34 points) and Wade (9-20 for 18) got to the rim a little, and Miami pulled to within 8 with 2 minutes to go. Wade okey-doked someone into the air, jumped into him, took the contact, and missed the jumper - no foul. The Celtics got a layup at the other end - ballgame, Was it a foul? Maybe. Would it be called a foul in Miami? Yep. Did Paul Pierce get that exact call twice on KJ James tonight? Yep. Dwyane Wade shot zero free throws tonight in 42 minutes - do you think that happens very often? Nope. KJ James shot only 5. That's how it goes. It's not unfair - in the NBA, the home team almost always gets the benefit of the doubt, especially in the playoffs. Miami got a big non-call on a Rondo drive in Game 2. Your choice is to, one, overcome the calls; or, two, lose. No easy way out.
3) Even more damaging than the home-to-road refereeing adjustment was the Heat's lack of defensive intensity, and their continued inability to make free throws. Boston's not a great offensive team - they are a great defensive team. But tonight they dropped 30-25-30 in the first three quarters. That's not good defending Too many layups - they ended up shooting 50% from the floor...But even with the refereeing and even with the poor defense, look, if Miami made any free throws, they still may have been right there. They missed 16 in Game 2 and escaped. Tonight they made only 10-20: KJ made only 1-5, Almario Vernard Chalmers, who was otherwise solid, 3-6. After a flurry of early misses, you know who finally stepped up and drilled two? Joel Anthony! Butter! He greased that ball up and slipped it right into that net, boy!
4) Kevin Garnett was great. He's a freak, he's like 50 years old and still incredibly spry. He's finally figured out two things. First, with Chris Bosh out, he's 5" taller than anyone Miami puts out on the floor. He set up shop near the rim, caught the ball, and flipped it in: 24 on 10-16 for KG. He also realized that without Bosh, he doesn't need to guard Joel Anthony or Ronny Turiaf, so he's ignoring them and standing down in the lane deterring Wade and James from getting to the rim - that's a big reason why they only shot 5 free throws between them. Nowhere to go in there. Against Indiana, Roy Hibbert utilized the same strategy as Garnett, but it wasn't nearly as effective, which is mostly attributable to the fact that he is Roy Hibbert. Save Bosh coming back, I'm not sure how Miami counters that - when they played KJ at center in the 4th quarter they made a huge run, but I'm not sure they can play that way the whole game. The easiest answer is that Bosh suddenly gets healthy, but we don't know how close that is...Garnett did also break out the doucheball a little tonight, although, to be honest, he's been fairly restrained in this area thus far in the series. He sent Almario Vernard Chalmers flying on a blatantly illegal screen on the baseline early in the second half, and then, later, drilled him up high with an intentional elbow, drawing a technical foul. You think KG gives an f about a technical foul? KG laughs at technical fouls! He eats technical fouls for breakfast! He takes a technical foul, ties it to the bedposts, slaps it around, teases it, then leaves it there tied up and goes out for a sandwich. Technical foul - Ha!
5) During the games, we are getting this one ad for the Rand Eye institute in Miami - lasik surgery. It's odd because I assume it is a local ad, but it's on ESPN. I guess they are selling local ad slots, but I never remember that being the case before. Maybe national advertisers are wary of being linked to doucheball. Anyways, it also odd because the testimony in the ad comes from a young man named Errol - not Errol Flynn, a young Errol dude - and he tells us halfway through the ad, "I got the custom lasik." Really? You sprung for the custom treatment? Big spender! I would probably try to save a little cash by just going generic. "Yeah, my eyes are kind of round and hazel-colored, but I'll take whatever you've got, I'll take the brown squinty eyes, sure. I'll take a bit of a lazy eye if you give me a 15% discount." ... GFOB Thor just got lasik and he's never been more eagle-eyed. I spent Memorial Day at his house and he was reading a list of most highly-compensated celebrities from a magazine to me - didn't stumble once while reading, it was like he had x-ray vision. He probably paid for the custom surgery...
6) It's M.Minutos' 40th birthday today (June 1). I played hooky from work and we went out to lunch at a cool spot called Brule in Pineapple Grove. They have a small but eclectic beer list. Mostly German beers. I'm part-English, part-Jewish - do you think I'm going to drink a German beer? Oh, hell no. I went with an English beer named Fullers. It was bright and delicious - a little bit of a party wine, frankly...We had a nice dinner at a Cuban restaurant with O. and P. Minutos, opened some presents, and there may or may not be some secret festivities planned for tomorrow. Best of all, for her, she doesn't know this yet, but as soon I as finish up spell-checking this sucker, I'm going to in there to give her a present that she won't believe. Un-wrapped! Ewwwwww!!!!!
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We'll be back at this Sunday for Game 4. If you need me before then, I'll be squinting it up all over town with my crappy 20-2,000 vision. When is Obama putting in free lasik for everyone? See you Sunday, Happy Birthday, M.Minutos, I love you!
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Friday, June 1, 2012
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Heat 115 Celtics 111 ot Heat lead 2-0
6 Thoughts
1) How long was that game? Five hours? Six hours? How many free throws did Miami miss? 35? Only 16? Really? 31-47 from the line? After a slow start in the first half, getting down 15, Miami worked their way back into the game in the third quarter, had several chances to put the game away, and kept missing free throws. KJ James missed 6, and Dwyane Wade and Almario Vernard Chalmers each missed 4. James made only 7 of 20 shots, and missed two fairly easy shots to win the game in regulation. Rajon Rondo had one of the all-time freaky games, throwing in basket after basket like some kind of semi-conscious refugee from Middle Earth. And, yet, somehow, the Heat dug it out at home, and take a 2-0 series lead to Boston. Ohhhh-ohhhhh, that had to hurt, Celtics! Let's GOOOOO!!!
2) Holy mackerel, how did nobody know that Mario "Emcee" Chalmers' real name is Almario Vernard Chalmers? For all the nasty things I've said about the national tv networks broadcasting Heat games over the years, for once they have scooped Sunsports - I've never been happier than when ABC's first half graphic finally revealed his true identity! And Almario Vernard was huuuuge! While Dwyane and KJ were making only 1 of their first 10 shots, and the Celtics were making 16 of their first 24, including 11 in a row to take a 15 point lead in the second quarter, Almario Vernard made 3 triples, including back-to-backers down 15, and scored 17 points in the first half to keep Miami in contact, down 7 at the break. He finished with 22 points, 6 assists, and 4 rebounds. He also made one of the biggest plays in overtime: with Miami up 2 with a little over a minute to go, Kevin Garnett caught the ball on the block and, with the Heat scrambling, tried to slip a pass to a cutter to the front of the rim, but Almario darted in and stole the ball, setting up the game-winning play (more on that play in #3). Before the game, Great Friend of the Blog Plumber reported that he had just heard Magic Johnson predict that Chalmers would be the key player of Game 2. I knew that boded well for Miami - just as I read Plumber's text, Dwyane Wade was shooting pre-game jumpers and Chalmers happened to wander across the court and inadvertently bump into him, knocking one of his shots awry. That's Almario Vernard Chalmers: razor-sharp, on his game, and fouling people even in pre-game warmups!
3) Play of the game: many, many candidates. There was the sick KJ block of a Paul Pierce layup which ignited an electric Wade three point play as Miami made its third quarter run. There was Chalmers' aforementioned steal. There was Shane Battier's triple from the corner under duress to tie the game at 94 late in regulation. There was a sweet KJ tip-in, and there were three huge Udonis Haslem baskets, including one Wade-drive-and-kick-to-open-UD-on-the-baseline-as-UD's-guy-helps-to-Wade-circa-2008-style! But none were bigger than after Chalmers' steal, when Miami brought the ball down the court up 2 with about a minute to go in overtime, spread the floor, and Wade split a double-team, careened into the lane, and Kevin Garnett tried to help over to him. Garnett (who earlier received a technical foul for swinging an elbow at former college Academic All-American James Jones) is, even at his age, one of the very best defenders in the league, but this time was late to the play, and he knew it. He had no real chance to stop the shot, so recognizing that Miami had missed about 100 free throws in the game, he tried to give a foul on Dwyane. Of course, being Kevin Garnett, the Granddaddy of Doucheball, he went up high, put one hand on Dwyane's elbow, and tried to hyper-extend it backwards, and another hand in his chest to try to shove him to the floor. However, Dwyane, with his douchometer on high alert, sensed what was coming, and met Garnett's assault with a pre-emptive kick to the nether-region area, collapsing Garnett justtt enough to allow Dwyane to flip the ball up and into the basket as the referee called the foul...and Dwyane finally made a free throw! Ballgame! Meet douche-y force with douche-y force!
4) Rajon Rondo was positively unbelievable. He made 16-24 shots, scored 44 points, and had 10 rebounds, and 8 assists. He's a non-shooter who made many. many jumpers, and even knocked down back-to-back deep garbage-time triples in the waning moments. Use 'em all up, Rajon! It was one of the best offensive games I've ever seen a guy play, honestly. Rondo is, at best, a bit of a social deviant - there's at least a 5 percent chance he's the dude down in Miami eating peoples' faces off - but after the game, at his press conference, he stood tall. Asked about a late call that went against him, a drive where he took a blow to the face but got non-called, he said, reflectively, "It's part of the game." And it is. Unless Dwyane or KJ get fouled driving to the basket late in a game - that's totally different, you absolutely have to call those fouls. That's just common sense.
5) For two and a half quarters, it looked like this was the game where not having Chris Bosh was going to murder Miami. Ronny Turiaf started, but was quickly replaced by Joel Anthony. Boston, specifically Kevin Garnett, totally ignored those guys and jammed up the paint, trapped screen-and-rolls, and generally made life difficult for Dwyane and KJ, totally stagnating the Miami offense. In 24 combined minutes, Turiaf and Joel made 1 out of 2 shots. That's not exactly productive (although it is efficient!). For most of the second half, Coach Spo decided to play Udonis Haslem at the center, switch all the screen-and-rolls, and rely on the team's general athleticism to turn the game into a scramble. Haslem helped hold Kevin Garnett to a 6-18 night, even though Garnett was about 4 inches taller than anyone the Heat played in the second half. In addition, UD contributed offensively - the three aforementioned monster baskets - and he finished with 13 points on 6-12, grabbed 11 rebounds (3 more than Garnett in 15 fewer minutes), and even had 3 assists - 2 on beautiful kickouts for triples. Satisfying night for UD - it wasn't always pretty, but it was a classic dogged UD effort.
6) "Rock of Ages?" Tom Cruise as a long-haired, chiseled-ab, hair-metal hobbit? Of course! When can I line up for that movie?...My five favorite hair-metal songs ever: 5) "Every Rose Has it Thorn" by Poison. 4) "Home Sweet Home" by Motley Crue. 3) "Don't Know What You Got Till Its Gone" by Cinderella. 2) "Girl, Don't Go Away Mad, Just Go Away" by Motley Crue. 1) "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele.
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Whew! Only 1 night off, then back at it Friday in Boston. Go up there, try to get one, and then get back here to the land of the face-eaters! If you need me before Friday, I'll be flagrant fouling O.Minutos in the front-yard, KG-style, then walking off the court before the game is over, like Paul Pierce! Have a great day, hair-rockers!
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1) How long was that game? Five hours? Six hours? How many free throws did Miami miss? 35? Only 16? Really? 31-47 from the line? After a slow start in the first half, getting down 15, Miami worked their way back into the game in the third quarter, had several chances to put the game away, and kept missing free throws. KJ James missed 6, and Dwyane Wade and Almario Vernard Chalmers each missed 4. James made only 7 of 20 shots, and missed two fairly easy shots to win the game in regulation. Rajon Rondo had one of the all-time freaky games, throwing in basket after basket like some kind of semi-conscious refugee from Middle Earth. And, yet, somehow, the Heat dug it out at home, and take a 2-0 series lead to Boston. Ohhhh-ohhhhh, that had to hurt, Celtics! Let's GOOOOO!!!
2) Holy mackerel, how did nobody know that Mario "Emcee" Chalmers' real name is Almario Vernard Chalmers? For all the nasty things I've said about the national tv networks broadcasting Heat games over the years, for once they have scooped Sunsports - I've never been happier than when ABC's first half graphic finally revealed his true identity! And Almario Vernard was huuuuge! While Dwyane and KJ were making only 1 of their first 10 shots, and the Celtics were making 16 of their first 24, including 11 in a row to take a 15 point lead in the second quarter, Almario Vernard made 3 triples, including back-to-backers down 15, and scored 17 points in the first half to keep Miami in contact, down 7 at the break. He finished with 22 points, 6 assists, and 4 rebounds. He also made one of the biggest plays in overtime: with Miami up 2 with a little over a minute to go, Kevin Garnett caught the ball on the block and, with the Heat scrambling, tried to slip a pass to a cutter to the front of the rim, but Almario darted in and stole the ball, setting up the game-winning play (more on that play in #3). Before the game, Great Friend of the Blog Plumber reported that he had just heard Magic Johnson predict that Chalmers would be the key player of Game 2. I knew that boded well for Miami - just as I read Plumber's text, Dwyane Wade was shooting pre-game jumpers and Chalmers happened to wander across the court and inadvertently bump into him, knocking one of his shots awry. That's Almario Vernard Chalmers: razor-sharp, on his game, and fouling people even in pre-game warmups!
3) Play of the game: many, many candidates. There was the sick KJ block of a Paul Pierce layup which ignited an electric Wade three point play as Miami made its third quarter run. There was Chalmers' aforementioned steal. There was Shane Battier's triple from the corner under duress to tie the game at 94 late in regulation. There was a sweet KJ tip-in, and there were three huge Udonis Haslem baskets, including one Wade-drive-and-kick-to-open-UD-on-the-baseline-as-UD's-guy-helps-to-Wade-circa-2008-style! But none were bigger than after Chalmers' steal, when Miami brought the ball down the court up 2 with about a minute to go in overtime, spread the floor, and Wade split a double-team, careened into the lane, and Kevin Garnett tried to help over to him. Garnett (who earlier received a technical foul for swinging an elbow at former college Academic All-American James Jones) is, even at his age, one of the very best defenders in the league, but this time was late to the play, and he knew it. He had no real chance to stop the shot, so recognizing that Miami had missed about 100 free throws in the game, he tried to give a foul on Dwyane. Of course, being Kevin Garnett, the Granddaddy of Doucheball, he went up high, put one hand on Dwyane's elbow, and tried to hyper-extend it backwards, and another hand in his chest to try to shove him to the floor. However, Dwyane, with his douchometer on high alert, sensed what was coming, and met Garnett's assault with a pre-emptive kick to the nether-region area, collapsing Garnett justtt enough to allow Dwyane to flip the ball up and into the basket as the referee called the foul...and Dwyane finally made a free throw! Ballgame! Meet douche-y force with douche-y force!
4) Rajon Rondo was positively unbelievable. He made 16-24 shots, scored 44 points, and had 10 rebounds, and 8 assists. He's a non-shooter who made many. many jumpers, and even knocked down back-to-back deep garbage-time triples in the waning moments. Use 'em all up, Rajon! It was one of the best offensive games I've ever seen a guy play, honestly. Rondo is, at best, a bit of a social deviant - there's at least a 5 percent chance he's the dude down in Miami eating peoples' faces off - but after the game, at his press conference, he stood tall. Asked about a late call that went against him, a drive where he took a blow to the face but got non-called, he said, reflectively, "It's part of the game." And it is. Unless Dwyane or KJ get fouled driving to the basket late in a game - that's totally different, you absolutely have to call those fouls. That's just common sense.
5) For two and a half quarters, it looked like this was the game where not having Chris Bosh was going to murder Miami. Ronny Turiaf started, but was quickly replaced by Joel Anthony. Boston, specifically Kevin Garnett, totally ignored those guys and jammed up the paint, trapped screen-and-rolls, and generally made life difficult for Dwyane and KJ, totally stagnating the Miami offense. In 24 combined minutes, Turiaf and Joel made 1 out of 2 shots. That's not exactly productive (although it is efficient!). For most of the second half, Coach Spo decided to play Udonis Haslem at the center, switch all the screen-and-rolls, and rely on the team's general athleticism to turn the game into a scramble. Haslem helped hold Kevin Garnett to a 6-18 night, even though Garnett was about 4 inches taller than anyone the Heat played in the second half. In addition, UD contributed offensively - the three aforementioned monster baskets - and he finished with 13 points on 6-12, grabbed 11 rebounds (3 more than Garnett in 15 fewer minutes), and even had 3 assists - 2 on beautiful kickouts for triples. Satisfying night for UD - it wasn't always pretty, but it was a classic dogged UD effort.
6) "Rock of Ages?" Tom Cruise as a long-haired, chiseled-ab, hair-metal hobbit? Of course! When can I line up for that movie?...My five favorite hair-metal songs ever: 5) "Every Rose Has it Thorn" by Poison. 4) "Home Sweet Home" by Motley Crue. 3) "Don't Know What You Got Till Its Gone" by Cinderella. 2) "Girl, Don't Go Away Mad, Just Go Away" by Motley Crue. 1) "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele.
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Whew! Only 1 night off, then back at it Friday in Boston. Go up there, try to get one, and then get back here to the land of the face-eaters! If you need me before Friday, I'll be flagrant fouling O.Minutos in the front-yard, KG-style, then walking off the court before the game is over, like Paul Pierce! Have a great day, hair-rockers!
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Monday, May 28, 2012
Heat 93 Celtics 79 Heat lead 1-0
6 Thoughts
1) I mean, that's pretty much how this series is going to go: two extremely tough defensive teams are going to battle for every inch of space on the defensive end, and then, offensively, Miami is hoping the superior athletic playmaking of Dwyane Wade and KJ James is enough to overcome the superior ball movement and shooting of Boston. Tonight was the blueprint for how Miami can win games in this series, even without Chris Bosh, who outplayed Boston's best player, Kevin Garnett, in last year's series. Winning the first game of a series at home against a team which had to travel isn't a huge accomplishment, and neither team played particularly well, but we'll take it. Have to be up for the fight against this Celtics team - it promises to be a long series...Let's go!
2) Again, this is how well KJ James is playing in the playoffs: he had 32 points on 13-22 shooting, a game-high 13 rebounds, 3 assists, 3 blocks, helped hold Paul Pierce to a 5-18 shooting night, and guarded Rajon Rondo during a key stretch of the game. And you would say, "yeah, he was pretty good, not great, not 'A' KJ, but a solid 'B.'" That's freaking crazy. Dwyane Wade also showed up big in the second half after a quiet first two quarters, and finished with 22 points on 8-13 with 7 assists. He ran the offense in the fourth quarter. Early on, he pushed the lead to 15 with a sweet driving mid-air-change-to-the-left-hand layup, then a high screen-and-roll left-handed bullet pass off the dribble to a diving Joel Anthony for a dunk. After Boston clawed back into contact under 5 minutes to go, he made another driving layup, then blocked a Rajon Rondo drive - from on the ball - then found a cutting KJ James for a foul to push the lead back to 16. Ballgame. Superstar games from KJ and Dwyane.
3) On the one hand, you would like to see the role players shoot it a little better: Miami created a lot of wide open jumpshots, mostly because Boston has trouble containing KJ and Dwyane off the bounce individually, but are extremely conscious about helping in the lane. Guys were open all night, KJ and Dwyane found them, but the triples didn't go in. Battier (2-9) and Chalmers (0-6) were the primary offenders on a night the Heat made only 5-25 threes. But the role players did contribute in other ways: Battier scrapped his way to 10 rebounds, and 10 points, and Chalmers had 5 rebounds, 4 assists, and only 1 turnover (an alleyoop to KJ off the bottom of the backboard). Mike Mil-lar scored 8 early points, and Joel Anthony had 6 rebounds and 2 blocks in 20 minutes. Miami won the rebounding battle 48-33, and blocked 11 shots to Boston's 1. As always, Miami just needs their role players to do something; KJ and Dwyane can do everything - if the role players do something to help, on good nights, those guys can fill in what's missing.
4) Play of the game: Late in the third quarter, with Miami starting to inch away from Boston, Paul Pierce got trapped up at the top of the key in a double team by Shane Battier and Joel Anthony, two long-armed and feisty defenders. Trying to extricate himself from the pressure, and already having picked up his dribble, Pierce reverse-pivoted back out towards halfcourt. When Battier and Joel went with him, and he still wasn't clear to pass, Pierce simply switched pivot feet and pivoted backwards again - at one point it seemed the refs were just going to let him reverse-pivot all the way 65 down the court out of bounds. Meanwhile, Battier and Joel stuck to him, and Pierce, tired of illegally retreating, tried to step up through the double, at which point Battier stuck his hand out and dislodged the ball, then beat Pierce to the floor to get to it first. With Pierce looming over him, and Battier facing back towards his own defensive basket on his knees, patiently waiting for KJ or Dwyane to come get the ball, Mario Chalmers suddenly burst upcourt and as he passed Battier, Shane hit him with a little lookaway backhanded shovel pass, which Chalmers took in stride, and flewww...okay, bolted...okay, ran kind of fast; okay, went at Mario Chalmers' speed to the other end, which in this case was enough, and dropped the ball in the hoop for a 12 point lead. Role players making plays.
5) This may not come as a surprise to anyone who has watched an NBA game involving the Celtics over the past 4 or 5 years, but they are a bit of a cantankerous bunch. They like to elbow you in the back, their bread-and-butter offensive play is the illegal screen, and they complain endlessly to officials. Here, in this blog, we like to call it "Doucheball," although we can't take credit for the term - some dude on twitter invented it when Jermaine O'Neal (of all people) took an unbelievably cheap body check on KJ James during a game last year during a Heat victory: "Celtics have reverted to their patented 'doucheball' style of play," the kid wrote. It's not a pejorative term- it is meant to be descriptive only. I have the utmost respect for how the Celtics compete on the basketball floor. Let tonight's record reflect that the Celtics accumulated 2 technical fouls for arguing (Ray Allen and Doc Rivers), 1 for repeatedly slapping the ball away from the Heat on made Celtics' baskets so that the Heat couldn't speed up the pace of the game (most frequent offender: Kevin Garnett), and 1 when Rajon Rondo, after another made Boston basket, tried to "accidentally" bump Shane Battier back over the photographers seated on the floor behind the basket, and the referee happened to be standing right there watching him. Oops. After the game, Doc Rivers, who literally complains to the refs every trip up and down the court (let's be honest, he's a nice dude at heart - it's Garnett's influence), called it the worst, most undeserved technical foul he has ever received, which was ironic because the technical seemed like a cumulative "will you just shut the hell up for one trip" technical from the ref, yet here he was after the game, still complaining about it. That being said, compared to the Pacers, who were intentionally going up high on KJ and Dwyane every chance they could, the Celtics kept their physical play within the general spirit of basketball, although after the game, Rajon Rondo, said that in the rest of the series, KJ and Dwyane "need to hit the deck." Uh-oh...
6) Here's another depressing thing about getting older: like, when you are a kid, and they remake, say, Superman - we in the business like to call that a 'reboot' these days - to you, the kid, there is an "old, musty" Superman, then they make the new one, then we're all good, right? We have the definitive Superman, we don't need any more Superman movies, ever. But, then the longer you live, they keep 're-booting' the series, and you're like, "wait, what - we already have the definitive one of those, why are we making another one." But the instant you say that - the instant you even think it - you know who that makes you? Your dad! Yikes. Tonight I saw the preview for the new Spiderman movie - there's no Tobey Maguire! And M.Minutos and I are looking at each other and we are both like, "where's Tobey Maguire" (not that either of us has seen any Tobey Maguire Spiderman movies - but it's the principle of the matter)? Then we realize that the Tobey Maguire Spiderman movies probably started during, like, the Gulf War - our kids, our 8 and 10 year old, they don't even know who this "young whippersnapper" Tobey Maguire is!!! Oh my heavens, so terrible getting old - for us, and Tobey Maguire!...In a related story, for the next Batman re-boot? How about Ellen Degeneres as Batman? She held a secret about her identity (kind of) for a long time; she's lithe; she's incredibly charismatic; she likes to wear black (it's slimming); and she probably hates crime. For her Robin: Jesse Pinkman from Breaking Bad; and for Alfred the Butler, Tim Allen. The end.
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Well, winning the first game is better than losing the first game, but everyone will feel a whole lot better if we can get Game Two Wednesday. You have to figure this is a fair fight, and is ultimately a 6 or 7 game series one way or another - Miami beat Boston in 5 last year, but Bosh played, and Rondo was dinged up. This year, the injuries favor Boston. If you need me before then, I'll be continuing my preparations for M.Minutos big day: Friday is her 40th birthday! And by "continuing my preparations," I mean, of course, "worrying about Game 2 of the Heat-Celtics series." Hope everyone had a Happy Memorial Day!
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1) I mean, that's pretty much how this series is going to go: two extremely tough defensive teams are going to battle for every inch of space on the defensive end, and then, offensively, Miami is hoping the superior athletic playmaking of Dwyane Wade and KJ James is enough to overcome the superior ball movement and shooting of Boston. Tonight was the blueprint for how Miami can win games in this series, even without Chris Bosh, who outplayed Boston's best player, Kevin Garnett, in last year's series. Winning the first game of a series at home against a team which had to travel isn't a huge accomplishment, and neither team played particularly well, but we'll take it. Have to be up for the fight against this Celtics team - it promises to be a long series...Let's go!
2) Again, this is how well KJ James is playing in the playoffs: he had 32 points on 13-22 shooting, a game-high 13 rebounds, 3 assists, 3 blocks, helped hold Paul Pierce to a 5-18 shooting night, and guarded Rajon Rondo during a key stretch of the game. And you would say, "yeah, he was pretty good, not great, not 'A' KJ, but a solid 'B.'" That's freaking crazy. Dwyane Wade also showed up big in the second half after a quiet first two quarters, and finished with 22 points on 8-13 with 7 assists. He ran the offense in the fourth quarter. Early on, he pushed the lead to 15 with a sweet driving mid-air-change-to-the-left-hand layup, then a high screen-and-roll left-handed bullet pass off the dribble to a diving Joel Anthony for a dunk. After Boston clawed back into contact under 5 minutes to go, he made another driving layup, then blocked a Rajon Rondo drive - from on the ball - then found a cutting KJ James for a foul to push the lead back to 16. Ballgame. Superstar games from KJ and Dwyane.
3) On the one hand, you would like to see the role players shoot it a little better: Miami created a lot of wide open jumpshots, mostly because Boston has trouble containing KJ and Dwyane off the bounce individually, but are extremely conscious about helping in the lane. Guys were open all night, KJ and Dwyane found them, but the triples didn't go in. Battier (2-9) and Chalmers (0-6) were the primary offenders on a night the Heat made only 5-25 threes. But the role players did contribute in other ways: Battier scrapped his way to 10 rebounds, and 10 points, and Chalmers had 5 rebounds, 4 assists, and only 1 turnover (an alleyoop to KJ off the bottom of the backboard). Mike Mil-lar scored 8 early points, and Joel Anthony had 6 rebounds and 2 blocks in 20 minutes. Miami won the rebounding battle 48-33, and blocked 11 shots to Boston's 1. As always, Miami just needs their role players to do something; KJ and Dwyane can do everything - if the role players do something to help, on good nights, those guys can fill in what's missing.
4) Play of the game: Late in the third quarter, with Miami starting to inch away from Boston, Paul Pierce got trapped up at the top of the key in a double team by Shane Battier and Joel Anthony, two long-armed and feisty defenders. Trying to extricate himself from the pressure, and already having picked up his dribble, Pierce reverse-pivoted back out towards halfcourt. When Battier and Joel went with him, and he still wasn't clear to pass, Pierce simply switched pivot feet and pivoted backwards again - at one point it seemed the refs were just going to let him reverse-pivot all the way 65 down the court out of bounds. Meanwhile, Battier and Joel stuck to him, and Pierce, tired of illegally retreating, tried to step up through the double, at which point Battier stuck his hand out and dislodged the ball, then beat Pierce to the floor to get to it first. With Pierce looming over him, and Battier facing back towards his own defensive basket on his knees, patiently waiting for KJ or Dwyane to come get the ball, Mario Chalmers suddenly burst upcourt and as he passed Battier, Shane hit him with a little lookaway backhanded shovel pass, which Chalmers took in stride, and flewww...okay, bolted...okay, ran kind of fast; okay, went at Mario Chalmers' speed to the other end, which in this case was enough, and dropped the ball in the hoop for a 12 point lead. Role players making plays.
5) This may not come as a surprise to anyone who has watched an NBA game involving the Celtics over the past 4 or 5 years, but they are a bit of a cantankerous bunch. They like to elbow you in the back, their bread-and-butter offensive play is the illegal screen, and they complain endlessly to officials. Here, in this blog, we like to call it "Doucheball," although we can't take credit for the term - some dude on twitter invented it when Jermaine O'Neal (of all people) took an unbelievably cheap body check on KJ James during a game last year during a Heat victory: "Celtics have reverted to their patented 'doucheball' style of play," the kid wrote. It's not a pejorative term- it is meant to be descriptive only. I have the utmost respect for how the Celtics compete on the basketball floor. Let tonight's record reflect that the Celtics accumulated 2 technical fouls for arguing (Ray Allen and Doc Rivers), 1 for repeatedly slapping the ball away from the Heat on made Celtics' baskets so that the Heat couldn't speed up the pace of the game (most frequent offender: Kevin Garnett), and 1 when Rajon Rondo, after another made Boston basket, tried to "accidentally" bump Shane Battier back over the photographers seated on the floor behind the basket, and the referee happened to be standing right there watching him. Oops. After the game, Doc Rivers, who literally complains to the refs every trip up and down the court (let's be honest, he's a nice dude at heart - it's Garnett's influence), called it the worst, most undeserved technical foul he has ever received, which was ironic because the technical seemed like a cumulative "will you just shut the hell up for one trip" technical from the ref, yet here he was after the game, still complaining about it. That being said, compared to the Pacers, who were intentionally going up high on KJ and Dwyane every chance they could, the Celtics kept their physical play within the general spirit of basketball, although after the game, Rajon Rondo, said that in the rest of the series, KJ and Dwyane "need to hit the deck." Uh-oh...
6) Here's another depressing thing about getting older: like, when you are a kid, and they remake, say, Superman - we in the business like to call that a 'reboot' these days - to you, the kid, there is an "old, musty" Superman, then they make the new one, then we're all good, right? We have the definitive Superman, we don't need any more Superman movies, ever. But, then the longer you live, they keep 're-booting' the series, and you're like, "wait, what - we already have the definitive one of those, why are we making another one." But the instant you say that - the instant you even think it - you know who that makes you? Your dad! Yikes. Tonight I saw the preview for the new Spiderman movie - there's no Tobey Maguire! And M.Minutos and I are looking at each other and we are both like, "where's Tobey Maguire" (not that either of us has seen any Tobey Maguire Spiderman movies - but it's the principle of the matter)? Then we realize that the Tobey Maguire Spiderman movies probably started during, like, the Gulf War - our kids, our 8 and 10 year old, they don't even know who this "young whippersnapper" Tobey Maguire is!!! Oh my heavens, so terrible getting old - for us, and Tobey Maguire!...In a related story, for the next Batman re-boot? How about Ellen Degeneres as Batman? She held a secret about her identity (kind of) for a long time; she's lithe; she's incredibly charismatic; she likes to wear black (it's slimming); and she probably hates crime. For her Robin: Jesse Pinkman from Breaking Bad; and for Alfred the Butler, Tim Allen. The end.
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Well, winning the first game is better than losing the first game, but everyone will feel a whole lot better if we can get Game Two Wednesday. You have to figure this is a fair fight, and is ultimately a 6 or 7 game series one way or another - Miami beat Boston in 5 last year, but Bosh played, and Rondo was dinged up. This year, the injuries favor Boston. If you need me before then, I'll be continuing my preparations for M.Minutos big day: Friday is her 40th birthday! And by "continuing my preparations," I mean, of course, "worrying about Game 2 of the Heat-Celtics series." Hope everyone had a Happy Memorial Day!
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Thursday, May 24, 2012
Heat 105 Pacers 93 Heat win 4-2
6 Thoughts
1) Dwwwyyyyyyaaaannnnnneeeee Waaaaaaaaaaaaadddddeee!!!!!!!!! He made jumpers! He made runners! He made floaters! He even made free throws! 41 points on 17-25 from the floor, 10 rebounds - this was 2006 Finals MVP Dwyane Wade. He: Took. The. Pacers. Apart. Then gave the game ball to suspended Udonis Haslem (who hit Hansbrough for hitting Wade) on the plane ride home. See ya, Pacers, yeahhh boyyy! This series is over! O-V-E-R!!! Let's Go!
2) Dwyane Wade dominated this game in every way a game can be dominated. But two role players stepped up and helped with huge plays of their own, especially in the third quarter when Miami turned a 2 point halftime deficit into a 10 point lead after three. Mario "Emcee" Chalmers hit back-to-back threes early in the quarter, then fouled George Hill on a three, but jinxed him into missing 2 of the 3 free throws. Then, in the final minute, up 4, Mike Mil-lar, who made 3 triples in the first half, caught a hit ahead pass in transition and drilled a 25 footer to go up 7, Miami got a defensive stop, then came back down, KJ James drove, drew defenders, then spit to Emcee, who knocked down his third triple of the quarter at the buzzer to put Miami up 10. Chalmers made 3-4 threes for 15 points and 0 - zero! - turnovers, and Miller made 4-7 for 12. Mil-lar's performance is made even more special by the fact that he can barely walk - watching him hobble up and down the court makes me groan.
3) In the series KJ James averaged 30 points per game on 50% shooting from the floor, 11 rebounds, 6 assists, and about 3 steals. He was completely phenomenal on both ends of the floor. I thought tonight he kind of breezed through the game expending only what effort he had to, which wasn't much since Wade was eviscerating the Pacers defense, but he still ended up with a 28-6-7 night, and put the game in the cooler with an unbelievable finish through a rough David West foul in the final moments, which, of course, went uncalled (welcome to KJ's life)...Meanwhile, the guy KJ took apart on the offensive end, Danny Granger, who talked, and talked, and talked, and talked, then removed himself from Game 5 when it started to get too physical, then talked, and talked, and talked, paused briefly to plead with the NBA to suspend UD for this game, then talked, and talked, and talked some more, averaged 13 points per game on 38% shooting, and "grabbed" 4.5 rebounds per night. I think he is supposed to be the Pacers best player. He was terrible, he got humiliated in this series. I'd like to think he learned a lesson, but I suspect he didn't...and talked, and talked, and talked, and talked...Still talking...
4) Play of the game: with Indiana desperately trying to stay in the game in the fourth quarter, a couple of bad Heat offensive possessions allowed the Pacers to claw from double digits down to within 5 with 8 minutes to go. Another bad set saw Shane Battier catch the ball late in the shot clock behind the three point line, fake a shot, then drive down the lane (slowly, but still driving), draw defenders, then slip a crafty little pass to a cutting Joel Anthony who somehow snatched the ball with the two sticks of butter he calls hands and layed it in the basket as he was getting fouled by both Danny Granger and Roy Hibbert: three point play! Crisis averted! Ballgame! Just how we drew it up! Next, we are going to install some dribble handoff actions between Shane and Joel, and maybe let them play together at the guard spots a little bit! Their talents have been under-utilized! Battioke off-the-dribble to Joel - Good Lord!
5) Ahhh, that's a shame, Pacers. They had a 2-1 lead in the series, and a 10 point halftime lead at home in Game 4, and somehow got beat badly three straight times, twice at home, tonight against a team missing two starters, to lose the series. That's fairly pitiful. Yet, never thought to shut the hell up a little, even after the series ended. David West: "The series was there for the taking. I just felt we got back on our heels the last three games." The last three games? The series was only six games long! You thought you should have won a series in which you played poorly in 3 of the 6 games? That's odd. West had a great offensive game tonight, but was again a huge problem for the Pacers defensively because he is either unable or unwilling to defend a pick-and-roll properly - he kept turning Wade loose to the paint, giving him a free run at the slow-footed Roy Hibbert. West scored 24, but he may have given up 34 - he's a very poor defensive player...Pacers coach, and noted liar, Frank Vogel: "I think we could have beat these guys if we had played our best, but we didn't play our best." Genius. "If we never, ever turned the ball over, and every shot we took went in, and every single shot Miami took missed and we secured the ensuing rebound, we definitely win this series." I also liked that Granger and West, who mean-mugged all series long at Heat players, then when Udonis flattened Hansbrough like a buttermilk pancake in Game 5, neither one of them ever went near UD, both left the court without shaking hands after the series ended. Class acts, those two, Jesus, grow up.
6) Link to Yahoo article online today: "Cell phone users like Obama; landline users prefer Romney." What? You have to be kidding me! What were the odds that cell phones users would prefer Obama, while folks who still use landlines would favor Romney? 100%, or only 99.9%? Here are some links to other Yahoo political polling articles from the past year or so:
"Guys who wear pleated dress slacks likely to power Romney effort in northeast."
"Voters who have at least even heard of an Ipad prefer Obama over Gingrich."
"Owners of above-ground pools would vote for Huckabee if he entered race."
"Men with overbearing female bosses are not big fans of Hilary Clinton, prefer anybody else on earth."
"North Florida man with hunting permit votes for Obama, but turns out it was a mistake."
"Biden supporters most likely to be alcoholics."
"Evening news watchers say Romney's their man."
"Gays love Obama; think Santorum is 'a douche.'"
"Lovers of fake pizza chains still believe Cain is electable."
"Obama slips ahead of Romney in crucial 'black guys who wear cardigan sweaters' demographic."
"No correlation found between voters with abnormally low i.q. scores and Michelle Bachman...yet."
"Guantanamo Bay prisoners again turn out overwhelmingly for Biden."
"Ron Paul widens lead with registered Republican college students who own bongs."
"Alaska and the Dakotas still major strongholds of Palin support."
"Indiana Pacers head coach Frank Vogel claims Obama approached him as potential V.P. replacement for Biden."
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We have a few nights off now - the Eastern Conference Finals will begin Monday night in Miami against the Boston Celtics. I mean there is absolutely NO WAY the Celtics could possibly lose Game 7 on their home floor Saturday night to Elton Brand and the lowly Philadelphia Sixers! That's impossible - that would be the biggest upset in the history of basketball! It's positively unthinkable! Celtics it is: this playoff run just got a whole lot douchier! We'll see you on Monday night. If you need me before then, I'll be showing O.Minutos film of Davd West trying to guard pick-and-rolls in this series: "O.Minutos, whatever you do, never do this!" Happy long weekend, jackapples!
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1) Dwwwyyyyyyaaaannnnnneeeee Waaaaaaaaaaaaadddddeee!!!!!!!!! He made jumpers! He made runners! He made floaters! He even made free throws! 41 points on 17-25 from the floor, 10 rebounds - this was 2006 Finals MVP Dwyane Wade. He: Took. The. Pacers. Apart. Then gave the game ball to suspended Udonis Haslem (who hit Hansbrough for hitting Wade) on the plane ride home. See ya, Pacers, yeahhh boyyy! This series is over! O-V-E-R!!! Let's Go!
2) Dwyane Wade dominated this game in every way a game can be dominated. But two role players stepped up and helped with huge plays of their own, especially in the third quarter when Miami turned a 2 point halftime deficit into a 10 point lead after three. Mario "Emcee" Chalmers hit back-to-back threes early in the quarter, then fouled George Hill on a three, but jinxed him into missing 2 of the 3 free throws. Then, in the final minute, up 4, Mike Mil-lar, who made 3 triples in the first half, caught a hit ahead pass in transition and drilled a 25 footer to go up 7, Miami got a defensive stop, then came back down, KJ James drove, drew defenders, then spit to Emcee, who knocked down his third triple of the quarter at the buzzer to put Miami up 10. Chalmers made 3-4 threes for 15 points and 0 - zero! - turnovers, and Miller made 4-7 for 12. Mil-lar's performance is made even more special by the fact that he can barely walk - watching him hobble up and down the court makes me groan.
3) In the series KJ James averaged 30 points per game on 50% shooting from the floor, 11 rebounds, 6 assists, and about 3 steals. He was completely phenomenal on both ends of the floor. I thought tonight he kind of breezed through the game expending only what effort he had to, which wasn't much since Wade was eviscerating the Pacers defense, but he still ended up with a 28-6-7 night, and put the game in the cooler with an unbelievable finish through a rough David West foul in the final moments, which, of course, went uncalled (welcome to KJ's life)...Meanwhile, the guy KJ took apart on the offensive end, Danny Granger, who talked, and talked, and talked, and talked, then removed himself from Game 5 when it started to get too physical, then talked, and talked, and talked, paused briefly to plead with the NBA to suspend UD for this game, then talked, and talked, and talked some more, averaged 13 points per game on 38% shooting, and "grabbed" 4.5 rebounds per night. I think he is supposed to be the Pacers best player. He was terrible, he got humiliated in this series. I'd like to think he learned a lesson, but I suspect he didn't...and talked, and talked, and talked, and talked...Still talking...
4) Play of the game: with Indiana desperately trying to stay in the game in the fourth quarter, a couple of bad Heat offensive possessions allowed the Pacers to claw from double digits down to within 5 with 8 minutes to go. Another bad set saw Shane Battier catch the ball late in the shot clock behind the three point line, fake a shot, then drive down the lane (slowly, but still driving), draw defenders, then slip a crafty little pass to a cutting Joel Anthony who somehow snatched the ball with the two sticks of butter he calls hands and layed it in the basket as he was getting fouled by both Danny Granger and Roy Hibbert: three point play! Crisis averted! Ballgame! Just how we drew it up! Next, we are going to install some dribble handoff actions between Shane and Joel, and maybe let them play together at the guard spots a little bit! Their talents have been under-utilized! Battioke off-the-dribble to Joel - Good Lord!
5) Ahhh, that's a shame, Pacers. They had a 2-1 lead in the series, and a 10 point halftime lead at home in Game 4, and somehow got beat badly three straight times, twice at home, tonight against a team missing two starters, to lose the series. That's fairly pitiful. Yet, never thought to shut the hell up a little, even after the series ended. David West: "The series was there for the taking. I just felt we got back on our heels the last three games." The last three games? The series was only six games long! You thought you should have won a series in which you played poorly in 3 of the 6 games? That's odd. West had a great offensive game tonight, but was again a huge problem for the Pacers defensively because he is either unable or unwilling to defend a pick-and-roll properly - he kept turning Wade loose to the paint, giving him a free run at the slow-footed Roy Hibbert. West scored 24, but he may have given up 34 - he's a very poor defensive player...Pacers coach, and noted liar, Frank Vogel: "I think we could have beat these guys if we had played our best, but we didn't play our best." Genius. "If we never, ever turned the ball over, and every shot we took went in, and every single shot Miami took missed and we secured the ensuing rebound, we definitely win this series." I also liked that Granger and West, who mean-mugged all series long at Heat players, then when Udonis flattened Hansbrough like a buttermilk pancake in Game 5, neither one of them ever went near UD, both left the court without shaking hands after the series ended. Class acts, those two, Jesus, grow up.
6) Link to Yahoo article online today: "Cell phone users like Obama; landline users prefer Romney." What? You have to be kidding me! What were the odds that cell phones users would prefer Obama, while folks who still use landlines would favor Romney? 100%, or only 99.9%? Here are some links to other Yahoo political polling articles from the past year or so:
"Guys who wear pleated dress slacks likely to power Romney effort in northeast."
"Voters who have at least even heard of an Ipad prefer Obama over Gingrich."
"Owners of above-ground pools would vote for Huckabee if he entered race."
"Men with overbearing female bosses are not big fans of Hilary Clinton, prefer anybody else on earth."
"North Florida man with hunting permit votes for Obama, but turns out it was a mistake."
"Biden supporters most likely to be alcoholics."
"Evening news watchers say Romney's their man."
"Gays love Obama; think Santorum is 'a douche.'"
"Lovers of fake pizza chains still believe Cain is electable."
"Obama slips ahead of Romney in crucial 'black guys who wear cardigan sweaters' demographic."
"No correlation found between voters with abnormally low i.q. scores and Michelle Bachman...yet."
"Guantanamo Bay prisoners again turn out overwhelmingly for Biden."
"Ron Paul widens lead with registered Republican college students who own bongs."
"Alaska and the Dakotas still major strongholds of Palin support."
"Indiana Pacers head coach Frank Vogel claims Obama approached him as potential V.P. replacement for Biden."
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We have a few nights off now - the Eastern Conference Finals will begin Monday night in Miami against the Boston Celtics. I mean there is absolutely NO WAY the Celtics could possibly lose Game 7 on their home floor Saturday night to Elton Brand and the lowly Philadelphia Sixers! That's impossible - that would be the biggest upset in the history of basketball! It's positively unthinkable! Celtics it is: this playoff run just got a whole lot douchier! We'll see you on Monday night. If you need me before then, I'll be showing O.Minutos film of Davd West trying to guard pick-and-rolls in this series: "O.Minutos, whatever you do, never do this!" Happy long weekend, jackapples!
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Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Heat 115 Pacers 83 Heat lead 3-2
6 Thoughts
1) Holy Pacquiao! Things got phys-i-cal! Flagrante! Miami measured Indiana for about 20 minutes, then blew their doors off to go up 3-2. Indiana coach Frank Vogel, a proven liar, has spent the entire series claiming the Heat are "floppers" - code for "soft." But Miami wasn't soft tonight, and they weren't flopping - they were hitting! Let's go!
2) Things got real at the beginning of the second quarter when Dwyane Wade drove to the rim, hung in the air, and Pacers power forward Tyler Hanbrough essentially punched him in the face, splitting Dwyane's eyebrow open. It was borderline ejectable - the referees didn't eject him, gave him a Flagrant 1, which is two shots and the ball. I think it was the correct call - I think context counts. Hansbrough is rough and somewhat spastic, but not dirty. The foul was too hard, but I think it fell shy of ejectable...Moments later, Hansbrough caught a ball on the wing, took one dribble to the rim, elevated, and Udonis Haslem leaped into the air and swung an overhanded double-karate chop at Hansbrough's face, sending him flying back to Chapel Hill, North Carolina. It was absolutely ejectable - it was stunning that three referees could watch that play, talk it about it, and then decide, "ehh - I guess that's okay." Again, context had to have saved him - since Hansbrough had just punched someone in the face trying a layup, I guess the refs decided to allow a little street justice - Flagrant 1 for UD...In the third quarter, KJ James drove to the rim and S.G. (Studio Gangster) Danny Granger grabbed him at the foul line by the arm and inexplicably spun him all the way around; a while later KJ drove and S.G. David West gave him an intentional shot in the head - no flagrants on either of those. Welcome to KJ's life...Later, Mario Chalmers, of all people, gave a barely non-flagrant shot to Paul George on a dunk try, swinging an arm up high on George, which didn't get to George's face only because he blocked it with his arms...The knockout blow came in the fourth quarter, during garbage time, when Lance Stephenson, who has annoyed the Heat with his series-long yapping from the bench (where he is anchored), and who aggravated hackneyed sportswriters everywhere who demand players "show class" when he gave KJ James a "choke" signal (hands around the throat) during a Pacer win, ran down the lane to chase a rebound and 300 lb Heat scrub Dexter Pittman took two steps and drilled him in the throat with an elbow (appropriately). That's about as hard as you can hit someone on a basketball court...In summary: no way Hansbrough gets suspended, he doesn't deserve it. UD probably gets one game - he deserves it. I understand he was protecting Dwyane, and Dwyane will absolutely pay UD's fine, but there's no argument to say he shouldn't be suspended. Pittman has to get multiple games - that's more than fair - but I can't say I didn't enjoy it. Stephenson went looking for trouble, and he found it. Crazy how that works sometimes. Also, note that when the proceedings got especially physical, Danny Granger removed himself for the rest of the game with what he claimed was a sprained ankle. Actual fighting broke out in this game, not just fake fighting, and Danny Granger was nowhere to be found. I didn't notice either Granger or West go looking for UD during the rest of the game, and UD was out there quite a bit. Funny, that. Going to be tough in Indiana Thursday without UD and Bosh, though...Here's UD's foul:
And Pittman's on Stephenson - notice at the very end of the clip, in the aftermath, Pittman winks at a teammate, I'm guessing Juward Howard (who has had multiple run-ins with Stephenson this season). I'm sure that's going to go over great at the league office!
3) Shane Battier was great in this game. Came in 2-19, or something absurd like that, from the floor in the series, and knocked down the first two shots of the game, both triples, to get Miami off quickly. Made 4-5 on the night and scored 13 points. Also took David West defensively and held him to a 5-13 for 10 points and 4 rebounds in 32 minutes, even though he is giving up 40 pounds to West. And, by the way, at least two of those hoops weren't on Battier, they came while he was on the bench. Just as importantly, the fact he takes West allows KJ to take an easier assignment defensively, and preserve his energy for other tasks.
4) KJ and Wade were both great - let's not lose sight of that. 30 on 12-19 for KJ with 10 rebounds and 8 assists, including one where he caught a bizarre hit-ahead curveball from Mario "Emcee" Chalmers, who bizarrely had 11 rebounds in the game, after Turiaf blocked a Hibbert layup. Chalmers' pass was sailing into the sideline stands when KJ reached back, cupped it with one hand, then in the same motion blazed a Justin Verlander fastball to a sprinting Dwyane Wade for the dunk (M.Minutos loves it when you mix sports metaphors). Dwyane pounded the paint - if he hadn't missed 6 free throws, he would have scored more than 28 on 10-17. Tonight those two got out in transition for buckets, and got in the lane in the halfcourt - when that happens, even without Bosh there, the team can score enough to win.
5) Play of the game: easily, when in the third quarter, with the Heat starting to pull away from the Pacers, the barely ambulatory Mike Miller somehow lost a shoe on a defensive rebound. As the Heat drove it upcourt, Miller, instead of quickly putting it back on - heck, sit down if you have to and do it quick - tossed it into the crowd. The Heat didn't take a timeout, and the Pacers came back down the court after a Heat miss. They immediately cleared out a side so that Leandro Barbosa, who is Miller's primary cover during Miller's minutes in this series, and who has scored approximately every time he's had the ball in space against Mike (Barbosa's too quick), looked at him, and immediately passed the ball back out top to George Hill! I DIDN'T THINK SO, LEANDRO BARBOSA! Hill dribbled for about 8 seconds, looked back at Barbosa, like, "what the hell is wrong with you - you're being covered by a guy with a broken back, no thumbs, and one shoe," and tossed it back to him, whereupon Barbosa held it for a few seconds, and then launched up a long three pointer which missed badly and the Heat rebounded. That's one stop for Mike Mil-lar! TNT color commentator Steve Kerr, watching the replay, correctly pointed out that Miller should have tried to put the shoe back on instead of throwing into the crowd, but incorrectly mused that "playing in a sock is a recipe for an injury." For most people, yes. But as we've seen, Mike Mil-lar is indestructible - he could play in no shoes, on a bed of nails and broken glass, and he wouldn't get injured...Play of the game, runner-up: definitely in the first quarter when Roy Hibbert got fouled while attempting to score. As Hibbert's first free throw dropped through, play-by-play man Marv Albert advised us that Hibbert shoots 71% from the free throw line. "I would have guessed higher," I told M.Minutos. "A lot higher. He really has a nice stroke, it's smooth, he puts a nice backspin on the ball - it's really one of the softer releases I've seen in recent memory, it's like a cotton ball being gently tossed into a bird's nes"--anddddd, clank!!! One stop for Dos Minutos!
6) One of my favorite things about the NBA playoffs: the commercials. I rarely get to see commercials at any other time during the year – like most people who don’t live in the Midwest, most shows I watch are on disc or dvr’d, and I speed right through the ads. Even basketball games –especially basketball games. Live timeouts at the end of a late-night, West Coast game? Killers. But, generally, M.Minutos and I watch the playoffs live, just for the fun of it. And one of the best parts of doing that is getting to see all the new ads. This year I definitely have a favorite, and it’s a subtle, but powerful, spot: The KFC Fully Maxed meal ad – watch it here:
1) Holy Pacquiao! Things got phys-i-cal! Flagrante! Miami measured Indiana for about 20 minutes, then blew their doors off to go up 3-2. Indiana coach Frank Vogel, a proven liar, has spent the entire series claiming the Heat are "floppers" - code for "soft." But Miami wasn't soft tonight, and they weren't flopping - they were hitting! Let's go!
2) Things got real at the beginning of the second quarter when Dwyane Wade drove to the rim, hung in the air, and Pacers power forward Tyler Hanbrough essentially punched him in the face, splitting Dwyane's eyebrow open. It was borderline ejectable - the referees didn't eject him, gave him a Flagrant 1, which is two shots and the ball. I think it was the correct call - I think context counts. Hansbrough is rough and somewhat spastic, but not dirty. The foul was too hard, but I think it fell shy of ejectable...Moments later, Hansbrough caught a ball on the wing, took one dribble to the rim, elevated, and Udonis Haslem leaped into the air and swung an overhanded double-karate chop at Hansbrough's face, sending him flying back to Chapel Hill, North Carolina. It was absolutely ejectable - it was stunning that three referees could watch that play, talk it about it, and then decide, "ehh - I guess that's okay." Again, context had to have saved him - since Hansbrough had just punched someone in the face trying a layup, I guess the refs decided to allow a little street justice - Flagrant 1 for UD...In the third quarter, KJ James drove to the rim and S.G. (Studio Gangster) Danny Granger grabbed him at the foul line by the arm and inexplicably spun him all the way around; a while later KJ drove and S.G. David West gave him an intentional shot in the head - no flagrants on either of those. Welcome to KJ's life...Later, Mario Chalmers, of all people, gave a barely non-flagrant shot to Paul George on a dunk try, swinging an arm up high on George, which didn't get to George's face only because he blocked it with his arms...The knockout blow came in the fourth quarter, during garbage time, when Lance Stephenson, who has annoyed the Heat with his series-long yapping from the bench (where he is anchored), and who aggravated hackneyed sportswriters everywhere who demand players "show class" when he gave KJ James a "choke" signal (hands around the throat) during a Pacer win, ran down the lane to chase a rebound and 300 lb Heat scrub Dexter Pittman took two steps and drilled him in the throat with an elbow (appropriately). That's about as hard as you can hit someone on a basketball court...In summary: no way Hansbrough gets suspended, he doesn't deserve it. UD probably gets one game - he deserves it. I understand he was protecting Dwyane, and Dwyane will absolutely pay UD's fine, but there's no argument to say he shouldn't be suspended. Pittman has to get multiple games - that's more than fair - but I can't say I didn't enjoy it. Stephenson went looking for trouble, and he found it. Crazy how that works sometimes. Also, note that when the proceedings got especially physical, Danny Granger removed himself for the rest of the game with what he claimed was a sprained ankle. Actual fighting broke out in this game, not just fake fighting, and Danny Granger was nowhere to be found. I didn't notice either Granger or West go looking for UD during the rest of the game, and UD was out there quite a bit. Funny, that. Going to be tough in Indiana Thursday without UD and Bosh, though...Here's UD's foul:
And Pittman's on Stephenson - notice at the very end of the clip, in the aftermath, Pittman winks at a teammate, I'm guessing Juward Howard (who has had multiple run-ins with Stephenson this season). I'm sure that's going to go over great at the league office!
3) Shane Battier was great in this game. Came in 2-19, or something absurd like that, from the floor in the series, and knocked down the first two shots of the game, both triples, to get Miami off quickly. Made 4-5 on the night and scored 13 points. Also took David West defensively and held him to a 5-13 for 10 points and 4 rebounds in 32 minutes, even though he is giving up 40 pounds to West. And, by the way, at least two of those hoops weren't on Battier, they came while he was on the bench. Just as importantly, the fact he takes West allows KJ to take an easier assignment defensively, and preserve his energy for other tasks.
4) KJ and Wade were both great - let's not lose sight of that. 30 on 12-19 for KJ with 10 rebounds and 8 assists, including one where he caught a bizarre hit-ahead curveball from Mario "Emcee" Chalmers, who bizarrely had 11 rebounds in the game, after Turiaf blocked a Hibbert layup. Chalmers' pass was sailing into the sideline stands when KJ reached back, cupped it with one hand, then in the same motion blazed a Justin Verlander fastball to a sprinting Dwyane Wade for the dunk (M.Minutos loves it when you mix sports metaphors). Dwyane pounded the paint - if he hadn't missed 6 free throws, he would have scored more than 28 on 10-17. Tonight those two got out in transition for buckets, and got in the lane in the halfcourt - when that happens, even without Bosh there, the team can score enough to win.
5) Play of the game: easily, when in the third quarter, with the Heat starting to pull away from the Pacers, the barely ambulatory Mike Miller somehow lost a shoe on a defensive rebound. As the Heat drove it upcourt, Miller, instead of quickly putting it back on - heck, sit down if you have to and do it quick - tossed it into the crowd. The Heat didn't take a timeout, and the Pacers came back down the court after a Heat miss. They immediately cleared out a side so that Leandro Barbosa, who is Miller's primary cover during Miller's minutes in this series, and who has scored approximately every time he's had the ball in space against Mike (Barbosa's too quick), looked at him, and immediately passed the ball back out top to George Hill! I DIDN'T THINK SO, LEANDRO BARBOSA! Hill dribbled for about 8 seconds, looked back at Barbosa, like, "what the hell is wrong with you - you're being covered by a guy with a broken back, no thumbs, and one shoe," and tossed it back to him, whereupon Barbosa held it for a few seconds, and then launched up a long three pointer which missed badly and the Heat rebounded. That's one stop for Mike Mil-lar! TNT color commentator Steve Kerr, watching the replay, correctly pointed out that Miller should have tried to put the shoe back on instead of throwing into the crowd, but incorrectly mused that "playing in a sock is a recipe for an injury." For most people, yes. But as we've seen, Mike Mil-lar is indestructible - he could play in no shoes, on a bed of nails and broken glass, and he wouldn't get injured...Play of the game, runner-up: definitely in the first quarter when Roy Hibbert got fouled while attempting to score. As Hibbert's first free throw dropped through, play-by-play man Marv Albert advised us that Hibbert shoots 71% from the free throw line. "I would have guessed higher," I told M.Minutos. "A lot higher. He really has a nice stroke, it's smooth, he puts a nice backspin on the ball - it's really one of the softer releases I've seen in recent memory, it's like a cotton ball being gently tossed into a bird's nes"--anddddd, clank!!! One stop for Dos Minutos!
6) One of my favorite things about the NBA playoffs: the commercials. I rarely get to see commercials at any other time during the year – like most people who don’t live in the Midwest, most shows I watch are on disc or dvr’d, and I speed right through the ads. Even basketball games –especially basketball games. Live timeouts at the end of a late-night, West Coast game? Killers. But, generally, M.Minutos and I watch the playoffs live, just for the fun of it. And one of the best parts of doing that is getting to see all the new ads. This year I definitely have a favorite, and it’s a subtle, but powerful, spot: The KFC Fully Maxed meal ad – watch it here:
I love this ad for several reasons. First of all, it looks like a really nice party – they are a group of diverse, well-dressed people, and the weather outside appears lovely. I also love any outdoor party with round tables scattered around the yard as they are in this party – that’s a great party to me, I love to walk around from table to table, hassle a person here, compliment a stranger’s beard there, you know. It is odd that they have a magician at a party with only adults, but maybe it is ironic, maybe the magician isn’t in on the joke. In any case, I like how the magician plays it – he’s aggravated that he’s losing the attention of the people at the party, but he doesn’t blow his top, or anything. He just goes to his homerun trick – levitation – way before he probably intended to. I mean, levitation – that has to be his show-closer, right? But all that pales in comparison to the guy actually eating the chicken. He’s a very handsome man, and, believe me, when you are watching a commercial over and over during the playoffs, that’s not unimportant. Great hair. Probably would be even better-looking with a beard, but, honestly, he’s such a good-looking, all-American guy that I’m not even sure he needs one. Love how he’s dressed: crisp, properly-fitting shirt, un-tucked– in fact, this is how I would try to dress if I were going to this party, which I wouldn’t be, because no one ever invites me to a party this cool. Ultimately, though, it’s his performance that wins me over. He’s enjoying the chicken, obviously - who wouldn’t? He doesn’t mean to be disruptive, he’s clearly not the kind of guy who goes out of his way to take the piss out of an un-ironic adult magician, but he is also self-aware enough to know, at a certain point, that he has disrupted the show. Watch the ad again: check out that sheepish head nod right at the end when they start clapping for him. It says a lot. It says, “Hey, I didn’t mean to disrupt the show, but I gotta tell ya – this chicken is great. Thanks for the applause – I’ll accept it humbly and graciously, because I am a high-level consumer of chicken: I found a great, value-laden, delicious meal, and I went for it. But let’s also give the lion’s share of credit where it’s due: to Kentucky Fried Chicken. They made the chicken, they put the value deal together – I’ll accept this applause, but just know that, in large part, I’m accepting it on KFC’s behalf.” That’s a lot for one nod. How many guys in Hollywood pull off that nod? Gosling – yes, of course, he’d kill this role. I think Pitt could do it. Clooney would probably play it a little broader, bigger smile, maybe some mock-arrogance – it’d be good, but a totally different commercial. Anyways, I told The Captain that I go hire this guy first if I’m ever asked to cast an hour-long, prime-time network drama. “I don’t think that’s likely to happen,” pointed out The Captain. Ah, well…
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Elimination game Thurday night in Indiana - that's a brutally tough game, on the road with no frontcourt players capable of scoring a basket outside of two feet, but I'll guess we'll see what happens. If you need me before then, I'll be scarfng down Kentucky Fried Chicken like I was, well, like I was a person from Indiana! By the way, for my free soda? I'll have a Dr. Pepper, please!
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Sunday, May 20, 2012
Heat 101 Pacers 93 Series tied 2-2
6 Thoughts
1) Sometimes, you get down 8 points at halftime on the road in a playoff game, you're already down 2 games to 1, your only competent big man is injured against a huge team, your second best player is struggling with a bad knee and started 1-8, you've been annihilated in the past two third quarters, and you're ready to let go of the rope. Just slip down into the dark, icy waters of, ummm, Indianapolis, get blown out, go back to Miami on Tuesday, no show, and start your offseason. The excuses are there: you really only have three really good NBA players, and one isn't there, and one is hobbling...Then, other times, faced with that same scenario, KJ James and Dwyane Wade score 38 points in a row for your squad, outscore the other team in the second half by themselves (43-39), then the all-time most beloved player in franchise history, Udonis Haslem, left for dead after the past few games, and who hasn't made a jumpshot in, essentially, two years, makes four jumpers in a row in the fourth quarter and you win going away down the stretch. I guess you never really can tell which one is going to happen! This is a series again: 2-2 and headed back to Miami! Let's go!
2) We're going to get to Dwyane and UD in a minute. But right now, man, let's talk about KJ James. He was great in the first three games of this series, the only person keeping Miami even reasonably competitive. And then today, with the Heat in dire straits, he took it to a whole 'nother level: 40 points on only 27 shots; 18 - eighteen - rebounds (6 - six - offensive); 9 assists; 2 steals; and 2 blocks, including a key chasedown block on Leandro Barbosa as the Heat was pulling away. He played 44 minutes. No one in the last 25 years of playoff basketball (according to ESPN's Tom Haberstroh) has posted a 40-18-9. In the last 10 years, only one player - Dwight Howard - has had a 40-18, and he had 1 assist in that game. Before the game, when you thought about how Miami, this banged up, might claw their way back into the series, you might have said, "Well, if KJ plays virtually the entire game, and dominates in every aspect of basketball on offense and defense, maybe we have a chance." And that's what he did! Today's game was one of the best all-around performances I've ever seen a player have - he dominated the scoring; he dominated the glass; he dominated the defensive end. He played a few possession without a headband when it got knocked off his head (no foul, of course - welcome to KJ's life). And, after the game, icing his knees in front of his locker, what did the Heat beat writers report that KJ was doing? Reading The Hunger Games. Doing! It! All!
3) Dwyane Wade is clearly laboring on his knee - if anything, I thought he moved less well today then he did in the first three games of the series. The difference today? He moved more. He got off to a slow 1-8 start again, and the series seemed fairly certain to go Indiana's way. But then he, and Coach Spo, adjusted. Miami stopped isolating and posting Wade against Paul George - healthy, yes, that's a total mismatch, Wade is going to go around him over and over, and create offense. But with his knee limiting him, he has been unable to generate his usual burst. So, instead, he started running the baseline, off the ball, as KJ went to work out top - KJ hit him on a backdoor baseline cut for his second hoop, and then Wade started to weave in and out of the defense, and KJ continued to find him for easy hoops. He started the third quarter by making his first 6 shots, the last a triple that put them up 1 with 5 minutes to go, then made back to back drives, including a finish around Roy Hibbert, that propelled Miami to a 6 point lead after three quarters. When you have Dwyane Wade and KJ James on your team, there aren't a lot of situations in which you are going to be allowed to be considered "gritty." But this was a gritty performance by Dwyane...
4) ...and an even grittier performance by his running mate and long-time friend UD Haslem (Hubie was in the house! - his main thing this series is to call Pacer forward Louie Amundson, which is pronounced like, "almond-son," without the L, "a-MUND-son," which couldn't be more incorrect! ). Let's face it: Udonis has been terrible all season long. We all - me, you, Dwyane, KJ, Coach Spo - we've all defended him whenever we can. We say, "oh, he defends," we say, "oh, he rebounds," we say, "he's a warrior." But at a certain point, a guy can do all those things, but he still has to get the ball in the basket when nobody is guarding him - and that exact issue, no one helping KJ and Dwyane score, has been Miami's biggest problem in this series. After playing a combined 19 minutes in the last two games, which was about 18 minutes and 59 seconds too long, today UD played 25 minutes. His two free throws with 1:30 to go in the third quarter broke the KJ-Wade 38 point streak. Then, after starting the fourth quarter by drawing an offensive foul when the aforementioned A-mund-son drilled him in the eye with an elbow (8 postgame stitches), with blood streaming all over his face, he made 4 huge jumpers in a row in the fourth quarter, including 2 under duress with the shot clock down, to put the game away. Not sure I've ever been happier for a player to knock a few shots down to win a game. What? No - that wasn't a tear in my eye after UD won the game, not at all. It's hot and humid in Florida - that was pure sweat. Ahhh, UD - love you forever, boy.
5) Let's check in on the studio gangsters, Danny Granger and David West, shall we? They were a combined 11-26 from the floor, and grabbed 11 rebounds, which is only 7 less than KJ got by himself. Pretty good. In the second quarter, Dwyane got wrapped up by Roy Hibbert on a drive. Hibbert held on a second too long - in fairness, I think he was trying to make sure Dwyane didn't fall (unlike Granger and West, I like Hibbert more than I did before the series - plays hard, but within his limitations, productive, gentleman - good dude). Wade, aggravated at being grabbed around the arms, and then held, kind of flung Hibbert's hands off him and walked away. Fine, neither guy had a problem with that, let's shoot the free throws. Except, you know who did have a big problem with that? Of course: Studio Gangster Danny Granger! Granger, who is getting eviscerated by KJ James in this series, obviously sprinted in from the perimeter, ran into Wade's chest, and started jawing at him nose-to-nose. That totally makes sense. Why wouldn't you do that? The look on Dwyane Wade's face was fifty percent boredom, fifty percent, "here's this douchebag again," and he just stood there without responding, which, somehow, made Granger look even stupider. Even Granger's teammates looked embarrassed for him. I mean, again, Danny Granger clearly only wants to fake fight - if he wanted to real fight, Dwyane Wade was standing right there in front of him - take a poke at him, Mr. Yappy! He was interviewed at halftime leaving the court, and his analysis of the incident was "it's getting chippy out there." ??? Dude - you're the only one getting chippy! You're the only who keeps getting technical fouls for needlessly getting in peoples' faces every game. You're the only one involved in every incident. Look around, dude - you're the lowest common denominator! This kid is unbelievable - really one of the least likable personalities in the league. He's always had that rep, but to see it four games in a row (so far) is fascinating. Must be tough to be a teammate of his. Oh - check that - one other Pacer didn't look embarrassed. David West! He took a first quarter cheap shot shove off the ball at KJ's back, which made KJ whirl around - when he realized who it was, he just laughed. Also swung a hard elbow after the whistle at Battier in the third quarter during Miami's run, which also made Battier laugh. Best of all - late in the third quarter and most of the fourth quarter, during Miami's run, the Pacers kept trying to trap Wade and KJ up high on screen-and-rolls. Luckily, it turns out for Miami that David West has no idea how to trap a screen-and-roll up high - he kept stepping out too slowly, and Dwyane and KJ kept going around him to the outside, getting into the lane, and creating numbers mismatches - it was West who was getting lost on UD's jumpers, because he couldn't contain the ball. That won the game for Miami. Can't say I was sorry to see it. Hard to find two guys less likable on the same team (but not impossible: Kobe and Artest! Garnett and Rondo! See, it can be done!).
6) So the Publix (grocery store) near my house is closing and moving across the street sometime in the next month. It's a small, old store, but it is only about a mile from my house, and I don't have to leave our neighborhood to reach it - it's a quiet, internal road, and easy to walk to, or ride my bike. So convenient. It's only moving across one street, like, .25 miles away, but it's a major street, so it's going to be tough to ride a bike there, and even driving will require me to go out into "real" traffic. For months since we found out about the move, everyone in my neighborhood has been complaining. We're all like, "ohh - soooo inconvenient, now we have to drive a mile and a quarter instead of a mile - it's going to take foreverrrr!" We live in South Florida- we aren't exactly tough. Saturday, though, I got gas in the new Publix plaza across the street, and I drove out past the new Publix, just to see how close it was getting. You know something? Ummm, those palm trees out in front of the new building looked kinda nice. Store looked a lot bigger, too. And a lot newer. Parking lot seems a little bigger, and the sidewalk leading into the store wider and safer. Seemed like more lights in the parking lot, maybe a little easier to see at night. Really liked the paint job. And is it me, or did the sun seem a little brighter over there? And, I'm not completely sure, but I think the air might have smelled a little fresher. You know what? I might be, kind of, just a little bit, sort of, looking forward to the new Publix (shhh - don't tell my neighbors). The moral of this story? I WILL DEFINITELY THROW ANYTHING, OR ANYONE, UNDER THE BUS IF I THINK IT WILL BENEFIT ME! The end.
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Well, we have a series again. We will be back in Miami on Tuesday for Game 5. Don't know if Dwyane's knees will hold out long enough for us to have a chance in this series - we shall see. If you need me before then, I'll be clearing out my pantry - anticipating some really nice, new foods at the new Publix - not the stinky, tired crap at my current location. Bon Appetit!
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1) Sometimes, you get down 8 points at halftime on the road in a playoff game, you're already down 2 games to 1, your only competent big man is injured against a huge team, your second best player is struggling with a bad knee and started 1-8, you've been annihilated in the past two third quarters, and you're ready to let go of the rope. Just slip down into the dark, icy waters of, ummm, Indianapolis, get blown out, go back to Miami on Tuesday, no show, and start your offseason. The excuses are there: you really only have three really good NBA players, and one isn't there, and one is hobbling...Then, other times, faced with that same scenario, KJ James and Dwyane Wade score 38 points in a row for your squad, outscore the other team in the second half by themselves (43-39), then the all-time most beloved player in franchise history, Udonis Haslem, left for dead after the past few games, and who hasn't made a jumpshot in, essentially, two years, makes four jumpers in a row in the fourth quarter and you win going away down the stretch. I guess you never really can tell which one is going to happen! This is a series again: 2-2 and headed back to Miami! Let's go!
2) We're going to get to Dwyane and UD in a minute. But right now, man, let's talk about KJ James. He was great in the first three games of this series, the only person keeping Miami even reasonably competitive. And then today, with the Heat in dire straits, he took it to a whole 'nother level: 40 points on only 27 shots; 18 - eighteen - rebounds (6 - six - offensive); 9 assists; 2 steals; and 2 blocks, including a key chasedown block on Leandro Barbosa as the Heat was pulling away. He played 44 minutes. No one in the last 25 years of playoff basketball (according to ESPN's Tom Haberstroh) has posted a 40-18-9. In the last 10 years, only one player - Dwight Howard - has had a 40-18, and he had 1 assist in that game. Before the game, when you thought about how Miami, this banged up, might claw their way back into the series, you might have said, "Well, if KJ plays virtually the entire game, and dominates in every aspect of basketball on offense and defense, maybe we have a chance." And that's what he did! Today's game was one of the best all-around performances I've ever seen a player have - he dominated the scoring; he dominated the glass; he dominated the defensive end. He played a few possession without a headband when it got knocked off his head (no foul, of course - welcome to KJ's life). And, after the game, icing his knees in front of his locker, what did the Heat beat writers report that KJ was doing? Reading The Hunger Games. Doing! It! All!
3) Dwyane Wade is clearly laboring on his knee - if anything, I thought he moved less well today then he did in the first three games of the series. The difference today? He moved more. He got off to a slow 1-8 start again, and the series seemed fairly certain to go Indiana's way. But then he, and Coach Spo, adjusted. Miami stopped isolating and posting Wade against Paul George - healthy, yes, that's a total mismatch, Wade is going to go around him over and over, and create offense. But with his knee limiting him, he has been unable to generate his usual burst. So, instead, he started running the baseline, off the ball, as KJ went to work out top - KJ hit him on a backdoor baseline cut for his second hoop, and then Wade started to weave in and out of the defense, and KJ continued to find him for easy hoops. He started the third quarter by making his first 6 shots, the last a triple that put them up 1 with 5 minutes to go, then made back to back drives, including a finish around Roy Hibbert, that propelled Miami to a 6 point lead after three quarters. When you have Dwyane Wade and KJ James on your team, there aren't a lot of situations in which you are going to be allowed to be considered "gritty." But this was a gritty performance by Dwyane...
4) ...and an even grittier performance by his running mate and long-time friend UD Haslem (Hubie was in the house! - his main thing this series is to call Pacer forward Louie Amundson, which is pronounced like, "almond-son," without the L, "a-MUND-son," which couldn't be more incorrect! ). Let's face it: Udonis has been terrible all season long. We all - me, you, Dwyane, KJ, Coach Spo - we've all defended him whenever we can. We say, "oh, he defends," we say, "oh, he rebounds," we say, "he's a warrior." But at a certain point, a guy can do all those things, but he still has to get the ball in the basket when nobody is guarding him - and that exact issue, no one helping KJ and Dwyane score, has been Miami's biggest problem in this series. After playing a combined 19 minutes in the last two games, which was about 18 minutes and 59 seconds too long, today UD played 25 minutes. His two free throws with 1:30 to go in the third quarter broke the KJ-Wade 38 point streak. Then, after starting the fourth quarter by drawing an offensive foul when the aforementioned A-mund-son drilled him in the eye with an elbow (8 postgame stitches), with blood streaming all over his face, he made 4 huge jumpers in a row in the fourth quarter, including 2 under duress with the shot clock down, to put the game away. Not sure I've ever been happier for a player to knock a few shots down to win a game. What? No - that wasn't a tear in my eye after UD won the game, not at all. It's hot and humid in Florida - that was pure sweat. Ahhh, UD - love you forever, boy.
5) Let's check in on the studio gangsters, Danny Granger and David West, shall we? They were a combined 11-26 from the floor, and grabbed 11 rebounds, which is only 7 less than KJ got by himself. Pretty good. In the second quarter, Dwyane got wrapped up by Roy Hibbert on a drive. Hibbert held on a second too long - in fairness, I think he was trying to make sure Dwyane didn't fall (unlike Granger and West, I like Hibbert more than I did before the series - plays hard, but within his limitations, productive, gentleman - good dude). Wade, aggravated at being grabbed around the arms, and then held, kind of flung Hibbert's hands off him and walked away. Fine, neither guy had a problem with that, let's shoot the free throws. Except, you know who did have a big problem with that? Of course: Studio Gangster Danny Granger! Granger, who is getting eviscerated by KJ James in this series, obviously sprinted in from the perimeter, ran into Wade's chest, and started jawing at him nose-to-nose. That totally makes sense. Why wouldn't you do that? The look on Dwyane Wade's face was fifty percent boredom, fifty percent, "here's this douchebag again," and he just stood there without responding, which, somehow, made Granger look even stupider. Even Granger's teammates looked embarrassed for him. I mean, again, Danny Granger clearly only wants to fake fight - if he wanted to real fight, Dwyane Wade was standing right there in front of him - take a poke at him, Mr. Yappy! He was interviewed at halftime leaving the court, and his analysis of the incident was "it's getting chippy out there." ??? Dude - you're the only one getting chippy! You're the only who keeps getting technical fouls for needlessly getting in peoples' faces every game. You're the only one involved in every incident. Look around, dude - you're the lowest common denominator! This kid is unbelievable - really one of the least likable personalities in the league. He's always had that rep, but to see it four games in a row (so far) is fascinating. Must be tough to be a teammate of his. Oh - check that - one other Pacer didn't look embarrassed. David West! He took a first quarter cheap shot shove off the ball at KJ's back, which made KJ whirl around - when he realized who it was, he just laughed. Also swung a hard elbow after the whistle at Battier in the third quarter during Miami's run, which also made Battier laugh. Best of all - late in the third quarter and most of the fourth quarter, during Miami's run, the Pacers kept trying to trap Wade and KJ up high on screen-and-rolls. Luckily, it turns out for Miami that David West has no idea how to trap a screen-and-roll up high - he kept stepping out too slowly, and Dwyane and KJ kept going around him to the outside, getting into the lane, and creating numbers mismatches - it was West who was getting lost on UD's jumpers, because he couldn't contain the ball. That won the game for Miami. Can't say I was sorry to see it. Hard to find two guys less likable on the same team (but not impossible: Kobe and Artest! Garnett and Rondo! See, it can be done!).
6) So the Publix (grocery store) near my house is closing and moving across the street sometime in the next month. It's a small, old store, but it is only about a mile from my house, and I don't have to leave our neighborhood to reach it - it's a quiet, internal road, and easy to walk to, or ride my bike. So convenient. It's only moving across one street, like, .25 miles away, but it's a major street, so it's going to be tough to ride a bike there, and even driving will require me to go out into "real" traffic. For months since we found out about the move, everyone in my neighborhood has been complaining. We're all like, "ohh - soooo inconvenient, now we have to drive a mile and a quarter instead of a mile - it's going to take foreverrrr!" We live in South Florida- we aren't exactly tough. Saturday, though, I got gas in the new Publix plaza across the street, and I drove out past the new Publix, just to see how close it was getting. You know something? Ummm, those palm trees out in front of the new building looked kinda nice. Store looked a lot bigger, too. And a lot newer. Parking lot seems a little bigger, and the sidewalk leading into the store wider and safer. Seemed like more lights in the parking lot, maybe a little easier to see at night. Really liked the paint job. And is it me, or did the sun seem a little brighter over there? And, I'm not completely sure, but I think the air might have smelled a little fresher. You know what? I might be, kind of, just a little bit, sort of, looking forward to the new Publix (shhh - don't tell my neighbors). The moral of this story? I WILL DEFINITELY THROW ANYTHING, OR ANYONE, UNDER THE BUS IF I THINK IT WILL BENEFIT ME! The end.
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Well, we have a series again. We will be back in Miami on Tuesday for Game 5. Don't know if Dwyane's knees will hold out long enough for us to have a chance in this series - we shall see. If you need me before then, I'll be clearing out my pantry - anticipating some really nice, new foods at the new Publix - not the stinky, tired crap at my current location. Bon Appetit!
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Thursday, May 17, 2012
Pacers 94 Heat 75 Pacers lead 2-1
6 Thoughts
1) Well, I'd be lying if I said I enjoyed that. You could see the blowout coming, you could feel it building ever since the late game meltdown Tuesday night in Miami, but it didn't make it any more enjoyable. How un-enjoyable was it? I couldn't even enjoy Mario "Emcee" Chalmers' big-time night. He kick-started the offense early, and scored a playoff career-high 25 points on 10-15 shooting, had 6 rebounds, 5 assists, and waiiiitttt for it: zero turnovers! And I couldn't even enjoy it. Okay - I enjoyed it a little. But the game as a whole, not so much...Up against it a little now, boy! Let's go!
2) Micro-problems: Dwyane Wade and shooting. Dwyane Wade played, maybe, the worst game of his career. Certainly the worst game of his career when the team really, really needed him to play a good game. He was 2-13 from the floor for 5 points, and was credited with 5 turnovers, although I can list 6 off the top of my head (I'll spare you). He also lacked energy defensively - it was an all-around desultory effort. His "highlight" came halfway through the third quarter when he got into a screaming match with Coach Spo on the Heat bench and players had to step in between them to ease the situation. I can understand both of their frustration. He simply has to play better - some people are theorizing he must be dinged up, or have migraines (which he gets from time to time), but he looked to be moving fluidly to me. Who knows?...The shooting, again, was atrocious: 4-20 from three point land (check this out: that raised their three point percentage for the series!), and 37% overall - and that's with Emcee Chalmers going 10-15. And, unlike the first two games in this series, they got open shots. The whole production got out of hand late, but for most of the night, Miami played well, generated open looks...and then fired blanks. Ballgame.
3) Macro-problems: personnel. Okay, Chris Bosh is out and, yes, now we can all see the specific ways in which he helps the offense. He's the best pure mid-range shooter on the team, and he is always the fulcrum around which the offense revolves - have to be honest, not sure that was correct, not sure things revolve around a fulcrum. Not even sure what a fulcrum is. But, come on, he's still only the third best player on the team, and other guys simply have to contribute in different ways. So what's the problem? One, the primary guy that should be replacing a little bit of what Bosh does and eating those minutes is Udonis Haslem. Give Spo credit - he's realized he can't put him out there anymore. Didn't start him tonight, and he only played 7 first half minutes. Didn't see him in the second half. He was 0-2 from the floor, both on shots around the rim, and he wasn't particularly sharp defensively. If he was the old UD, he'd stand in Bosh's spot at the elbow and knock down jumpers. He's not that guy anymore, and maybe the foot injury he suffered last year and age will prevent him from ever being that guy again. Since they can't play him, Spo gave Dexter Pittman a whirl - predictably, this is too high a level for him. He played three minutes, only, and his highlight was probably when he spun baseline to the basket and stuffed himself on the bottom of the rim. That means Battier should play more - but while his work defensively has been terrific in the series (the two guys he covers, Granger and West, were 11-28), he was 0-6 tonight on 6 wide open three pointers, and 0-7 overall. So anything he's gaining on the defensive end, he's giving back offensively. Turiaf is limited - though he did have 8 rebounds in 17 minutes tonight. You'd like to play Mike Mil-lar more - he made 2-3 triples in 17 minutes - but, of course, he's completely banged up again. His back looks gone, and it seems like his hernia and groin are bothering him again - he can't move (speaking of hernias - guaranteed, Bosh is going to end up having hernia surgery in the offseason, right? "strained ab," my booty). So while we went into this season thinking that the depth would be better, right now we are in the same place we were in last year with Miller severely limited, and UD a non-factor; except now, we've traded Bosh for Battier (and worst of all: NO MIKE BIBBY!). Grim - it's not enough productive NBA-level two-way players right now. It's KJ and Dwyane, and sometimes Chalmers. Wade was bad tonight, and this is what happens. That's a macro roster problem. Don't know how it's going to get solved between now and Sunday.
4) Okay, we talked about this before: a lot of this series comes down to Indiana trying to pound Miami inside, primarily with Roy Hibbert, and Miami trying to take advantage of Hibbert's inability to defend pick-and-roll plays. If you only looked at the numbers, you'd say, "Oh, this went Indiana's way tonight." Hibbert was fantastic on offense with 19 points and 18 rebounds, 5 of them offensive. He also blocked 5 shots, an impressive number. But Miami definitely figured out how to create open shots against Indiana: they put Hibbert in pick-and-rolls over and over, and it worked pretty well. Miami got down 11-2 early, then Emcee Chalmers scored 4 consecutive baskets by getting a screen, driving at Hibbert who would immediately compensate for his lack of foot speed by sagging, and then Chalmers would make an easy 10 foot runner. KJ James had 16 in the first half using the exact same strategy. If Hibbert scored 19, he probably gave up about 30. In the second half, this strategy finally made Indiana change its defense - they had to leave shooters to come down and help in the lane. Miami found their guys - and they missed. Sometimes the game plan is right, the execution is good, and then you shoot like you're trying to drop a ping pong ball into a plastic cup from the top of a ferris wheel. And around a fulcrum.
5) Indiana deserves to be ahead in this series - they have played their butts off. It hasn't always been pretty, but they've gotten it done, and if they win at home Sunday, they'll have Miami on the ropes. I respect the effort. But David West and Danny Granger are, to borrow a phrase from UD, a pair of studio gangsters. They have a rep for it anyways, and this series has seen them ratchet it up to a new level. It's a punk move to go into someone's face in an NBA basketball game, and West and Granger keep doing it over and over. Tonight West took exception to Emcee Chalmers slapping the ball out of his hands on a possession, shoved Chalmers in the chest, and then went nose-to-nose with him, chirping. West is probably 6 inches taller and 60 pounds heavier than Chalmers, first of all. Second of all, Chalmers can't haul off and punch West in the face - he knows he'll get ejected. And by the way, David West, Chalmers is standing right there in front of you, he didn't back down. If you really want a piece of him, go ahead and take it. West didn't take it - he just keeps running the fake tough guy act out there over and over. Granger, too - he grabbed KJ's jersey from behind on a runout to take a foul, then as he pulled himself by after the whistle, went up high with a forearm across KJ's chest, which KJ responded to by flaring an elbow, like a "get the f off me" elbow - didn't hit him with it, just showed it. Granger responded by wheeling and going chest-to-chest with KJ, who, as he always does, just shrugged him off. Again, KJ can't punch him. Miami can't afford to lose KJ for fighting; Indiana can afford to lose Granger for fighting - and even if they couldn't, it's a ridiculous act. Not sure I understand the point - what does it mean to get into someone's face like that? On the plus side, if they happen to win this series, oh my goodness: West and Granger against Garnett and Rondo! Studio Gangster-off!!! #Doucheball
6) So, all the time people will say to me, “Ohh, you’re sooo in love with Ryan Gosling, you have a man-crush on him, he’s your favorite actor.” All true – but only to a point. He’s my favorite current actor, out of actors you might conceivably see in a movie these days, true. But he’s not my all-time favorite actor. Who is? Haven’t we covered this before? I thought we had, but at Dos M. Int’l HQs today, The Captain looks over at me at one point and says, “Have you ever heard of the actor David Naughton?” Have I ever heard of the actor David Naughton? Mon Dieu!!! David Naughton is from the same town as me, he’s the all-time West Hartford , Connecticut hero!!! So, you might say, “Who is David Naughton,” and then I would say, “What the hell is wrong with you? He’s only one of the greatest triple-threat entertainers Hollywood has ever seen!” He started off his career in the late 70s showing off his singing, dancing, and acting in the outstanding Dr. Pepper commercial campaign “I’m a Pepper, you’re a Pepper, he’s a Pepper, she’s a Pepper – wouldn’t you like to be a Pepper, too? Yes! Yes, I would! Who wouldn’t? Check it out:
By the way, I think that song was written by The Beatles - isn't it on the same album as The Taxman?...Anyways, then Naughton went on to star in the excellent film “American Werewolf in London,” directed by the hottest Hollywood director of the time, John Landis (before he killed a dude during the filming of “The Twilight Zone” movie). I was just a kid when the movie came out, but I think it is fair to say that my sleepy little town was abuzz with excitement. My parents took me to see it in the theater, and we hardly ever went to the movie theater, since we didn’t have a theater in my town and we had to drive allll the way back through Hartford to the excitement of East Hartford if we wanted to watch a film. Not sure exactly what year this was, but I am pretty positive that he won the Best Actor award at the Oscars, as far as you know. Probably the best werewolf movie ever – Van Pattinson, or whatever his name is, can’t hold a candle to David Naughton. Probably drinks Orange Crush, too…Personally, I don’t drink a ton of soda, but every once in a while I will kick back with a Dr. Pepper, sip it down slowly, and remember the good old days. And by “remembering the good old days,” I mean that I tell M.Minutos the exact same story, over and over, about how excited I was to go see David Naughton in “American Werewolf in London,” many, many moons ago. She absolutely loves hearing about it! You would think she would get tired of it, but, no, she never does!!! Also, she claims that I don’t even like Dr. Pepper – when I told this to The Captain today, he asked me if I really did like it, or if I just drink it to annoy M.Minutos, and I had to admit that, at this point, I honestly don’t even know. “I guess your loyalty stands in the way of your taste buds,” mused The Captain, and you know what? I think he may be right. Anyways, the point is that David Naughton is super-awesome and the best dude ever, just like everyone else from my town. The end.
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Next game is, of course, Sunday afternoon in Indiana. If we don't win that game, we are in huge trouble. It would be a disappointing season to go out in the second round, but at least this blog could go on vacation earlier - this is pretty much the time of year I am so sick of writing it that I pray for the sweet release of elimination! If you need me before then, I'll be guzzling Dr. Pepper while listening to Revolver. I'm a Pepper, jackapples!!!
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1) Well, I'd be lying if I said I enjoyed that. You could see the blowout coming, you could feel it building ever since the late game meltdown Tuesday night in Miami, but it didn't make it any more enjoyable. How un-enjoyable was it? I couldn't even enjoy Mario "Emcee" Chalmers' big-time night. He kick-started the offense early, and scored a playoff career-high 25 points on 10-15 shooting, had 6 rebounds, 5 assists, and waiiiitttt for it: zero turnovers! And I couldn't even enjoy it. Okay - I enjoyed it a little. But the game as a whole, not so much...Up against it a little now, boy! Let's go!
2) Micro-problems: Dwyane Wade and shooting. Dwyane Wade played, maybe, the worst game of his career. Certainly the worst game of his career when the team really, really needed him to play a good game. He was 2-13 from the floor for 5 points, and was credited with 5 turnovers, although I can list 6 off the top of my head (I'll spare you). He also lacked energy defensively - it was an all-around desultory effort. His "highlight" came halfway through the third quarter when he got into a screaming match with Coach Spo on the Heat bench and players had to step in between them to ease the situation. I can understand both of their frustration. He simply has to play better - some people are theorizing he must be dinged up, or have migraines (which he gets from time to time), but he looked to be moving fluidly to me. Who knows?...The shooting, again, was atrocious: 4-20 from three point land (check this out: that raised their three point percentage for the series!), and 37% overall - and that's with Emcee Chalmers going 10-15. And, unlike the first two games in this series, they got open shots. The whole production got out of hand late, but for most of the night, Miami played well, generated open looks...and then fired blanks. Ballgame.
3) Macro-problems: personnel. Okay, Chris Bosh is out and, yes, now we can all see the specific ways in which he helps the offense. He's the best pure mid-range shooter on the team, and he is always the fulcrum around which the offense revolves - have to be honest, not sure that was correct, not sure things revolve around a fulcrum. Not even sure what a fulcrum is. But, come on, he's still only the third best player on the team, and other guys simply have to contribute in different ways. So what's the problem? One, the primary guy that should be replacing a little bit of what Bosh does and eating those minutes is Udonis Haslem. Give Spo credit - he's realized he can't put him out there anymore. Didn't start him tonight, and he only played 7 first half minutes. Didn't see him in the second half. He was 0-2 from the floor, both on shots around the rim, and he wasn't particularly sharp defensively. If he was the old UD, he'd stand in Bosh's spot at the elbow and knock down jumpers. He's not that guy anymore, and maybe the foot injury he suffered last year and age will prevent him from ever being that guy again. Since they can't play him, Spo gave Dexter Pittman a whirl - predictably, this is too high a level for him. He played three minutes, only, and his highlight was probably when he spun baseline to the basket and stuffed himself on the bottom of the rim. That means Battier should play more - but while his work defensively has been terrific in the series (the two guys he covers, Granger and West, were 11-28), he was 0-6 tonight on 6 wide open three pointers, and 0-7 overall. So anything he's gaining on the defensive end, he's giving back offensively. Turiaf is limited - though he did have 8 rebounds in 17 minutes tonight. You'd like to play Mike Mil-lar more - he made 2-3 triples in 17 minutes - but, of course, he's completely banged up again. His back looks gone, and it seems like his hernia and groin are bothering him again - he can't move (speaking of hernias - guaranteed, Bosh is going to end up having hernia surgery in the offseason, right? "strained ab," my booty). So while we went into this season thinking that the depth would be better, right now we are in the same place we were in last year with Miller severely limited, and UD a non-factor; except now, we've traded Bosh for Battier (and worst of all: NO MIKE BIBBY!). Grim - it's not enough productive NBA-level two-way players right now. It's KJ and Dwyane, and sometimes Chalmers. Wade was bad tonight, and this is what happens. That's a macro roster problem. Don't know how it's going to get solved between now and Sunday.
4) Okay, we talked about this before: a lot of this series comes down to Indiana trying to pound Miami inside, primarily with Roy Hibbert, and Miami trying to take advantage of Hibbert's inability to defend pick-and-roll plays. If you only looked at the numbers, you'd say, "Oh, this went Indiana's way tonight." Hibbert was fantastic on offense with 19 points and 18 rebounds, 5 of them offensive. He also blocked 5 shots, an impressive number. But Miami definitely figured out how to create open shots against Indiana: they put Hibbert in pick-and-rolls over and over, and it worked pretty well. Miami got down 11-2 early, then Emcee Chalmers scored 4 consecutive baskets by getting a screen, driving at Hibbert who would immediately compensate for his lack of foot speed by sagging, and then Chalmers would make an easy 10 foot runner. KJ James had 16 in the first half using the exact same strategy. If Hibbert scored 19, he probably gave up about 30. In the second half, this strategy finally made Indiana change its defense - they had to leave shooters to come down and help in the lane. Miami found their guys - and they missed. Sometimes the game plan is right, the execution is good, and then you shoot like you're trying to drop a ping pong ball into a plastic cup from the top of a ferris wheel. And around a fulcrum.
5) Indiana deserves to be ahead in this series - they have played their butts off. It hasn't always been pretty, but they've gotten it done, and if they win at home Sunday, they'll have Miami on the ropes. I respect the effort. But David West and Danny Granger are, to borrow a phrase from UD, a pair of studio gangsters. They have a rep for it anyways, and this series has seen them ratchet it up to a new level. It's a punk move to go into someone's face in an NBA basketball game, and West and Granger keep doing it over and over. Tonight West took exception to Emcee Chalmers slapping the ball out of his hands on a possession, shoved Chalmers in the chest, and then went nose-to-nose with him, chirping. West is probably 6 inches taller and 60 pounds heavier than Chalmers, first of all. Second of all, Chalmers can't haul off and punch West in the face - he knows he'll get ejected. And by the way, David West, Chalmers is standing right there in front of you, he didn't back down. If you really want a piece of him, go ahead and take it. West didn't take it - he just keeps running the fake tough guy act out there over and over. Granger, too - he grabbed KJ's jersey from behind on a runout to take a foul, then as he pulled himself by after the whistle, went up high with a forearm across KJ's chest, which KJ responded to by flaring an elbow, like a "get the f off me" elbow - didn't hit him with it, just showed it. Granger responded by wheeling and going chest-to-chest with KJ, who, as he always does, just shrugged him off. Again, KJ can't punch him. Miami can't afford to lose KJ for fighting; Indiana can afford to lose Granger for fighting - and even if they couldn't, it's a ridiculous act. Not sure I understand the point - what does it mean to get into someone's face like that? On the plus side, if they happen to win this series, oh my goodness: West and Granger against Garnett and Rondo! Studio Gangster-off!!! #Doucheball
By the way, I think that song was written by The Beatles - isn't it on the same album as The Taxman?...Anyways, then Naughton went on to star in the excellent film “American Werewolf in London,” directed by the hottest Hollywood director of the time, John Landis (before he killed a dude during the filming of “The Twilight Zone” movie). I was just a kid when the movie came out, but I think it is fair to say that my sleepy little town was abuzz with excitement. My parents took me to see it in the theater, and we hardly ever went to the movie theater, since we didn’t have a theater in my town and we had to drive allll the way back through Hartford to the excitement of East Hartford if we wanted to watch a film. Not sure exactly what year this was, but I am pretty positive that he won the Best Actor award at the Oscars, as far as you know. Probably the best werewolf movie ever – Van Pattinson, or whatever his name is, can’t hold a candle to David Naughton. Probably drinks Orange Crush, too…Personally, I don’t drink a ton of soda, but every once in a while I will kick back with a Dr. Pepper, sip it down slowly, and remember the good old days. And by “remembering the good old days,” I mean that I tell M.Minutos the exact same story, over and over, about how excited I was to go see David Naughton in “American Werewolf in London,” many, many moons ago. She absolutely loves hearing about it! You would think she would get tired of it, but, no, she never does!!! Also, she claims that I don’t even like Dr. Pepper – when I told this to The Captain today, he asked me if I really did like it, or if I just drink it to annoy M.Minutos, and I had to admit that, at this point, I honestly don’t even know. “I guess your loyalty stands in the way of your taste buds,” mused The Captain, and you know what? I think he may be right. Anyways, the point is that David Naughton is super-awesome and the best dude ever, just like everyone else from my town. The end.
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Next game is, of course, Sunday afternoon in Indiana. If we don't win that game, we are in huge trouble. It would be a disappointing season to go out in the second round, but at least this blog could go on vacation earlier - this is pretty much the time of year I am so sick of writing it that I pray for the sweet release of elimination! If you need me before then, I'll be guzzling Dr. Pepper while listening to Revolver. I'm a Pepper, jackapples!!!
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