Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Heat 103 Pacers 102 ot Heat lead 1-0

6 Thoughts

1) The Mario Chalmers shirt is now 5-0 (MARIO CHALMERS SHIRT POWER!!!), but I almost wish we lost tonight.  Can't wash it until we lose; it smells bad, it's a very familiar odor, but I can't quite place it...Hmm...What is that smell?...Oh yeah: it smells like Roy Hibbert's armpit after an overtime playoff loss to the Heat when King James bolts to the rim and makes a layup to win the game at the buzzer!  Yeah, that's what it smells like, I'd recognize that stench anywhere!  A crazy game, with some huge shots, and a lot of lying: let's go, and LET IT FLY!!!

2) There were innumerable ridiculous plays down the stretch of this game.  Paul George heaved in a 30 footer to send the game to overtime, and made a 3 point play in the ot when the ball kind of flew out of his hands into the basket while he stumbled down the lane and a foul was called on KJ James (remember that for a second).  But just as huge was an overtime sweeping Birdman Anderson hook shot attempt, which led to a foul and him line-driving in the 2 free throws, which seemed like the only free throws we made in the game up to that point.  Then a Chris Bosh early-shove off of the constantly clutching Roy Hibbert led to a Bosh put back and foul on George to tie the game late.  Finally, up 2, Norris Cole stole a ball from George Hill, dove on it, Hill dove on Cole and wrapped his leg around Norris' head, dislodging the ball, and Paul George ended up with it and launched another prayer, this time an airball, except the ref called a light brush foul on Dwyane Wade to give George three free throws which, to his credit, he made.  His post-game press conference reaction, though, made it clear he didn't think he got fouled on that play - kind of got a little nervous, made a weird face, and then half-heartedly asserted that he did.  Remember that one, too.  Lying is rampant on that team, of course, we'll get to that in a second.  Finally, with 2.2 to go, KJ James caught an inbounds pass, George pushed up too high on him, KJ blew by him, George tried to re-route his drive with a forearm - the exact same foul that got called on James in ot on George on his stumbling three point play and at least as much contact as on George's three pointer which even he didn't think was a foul -  this time, of course, no call (it's KJ James - he has to finish through any and all contact), but it didn't matter, James layed it in, Dwyane Wade jumped 10 feet in the air off the bench, and the Mario Chalmers shirt, even with it's namesake sidelined with a bad shoulder after back-to-back Hibbert and West cheap shots on him, remained undefeated.  I can save those laundry quarters for the arcade this weekend!

3) We all know Frank Vogel is a liar, it's been proven many times.  It all began last year, when he lied to Heat television announcers Eric Reid and Tony Fiorentino, telling them before the game that they would not play zone defense against Miami because they didn't even have a zone in their arsenal, they had never practiced one.  Halfway through the first quarter: zone.  Then, in the playoffs, he asserted that Miami is the biggest bunch of floppers in the league.  That's obviously not true - no one gets fewer calls than KJ James.  Unless Vogel is an absolute idiot, he knows that's wrong, and he clearly seems to be more "evil" than "dumb."  And there he was tonight, with pretty much every word out of his mouth b.s.  Before the game, he told the assembled reporters: "we don't adjust to other teams' adjustments."  Yet, twice in the closing moments of overtime, with the game on the line, when Miami went small, Vogel took the man he calls "the best rim protector in the NBA," Roy Hibbert (or as Eric Reid derisively called him in the postgame highlights "Ray Hibbert") off the court.  Both times KJ James went right to the rim, got fouled (both uncalled), and made layups.   So when Vogel bragged "we don't adjust to other teams' adjustments," it seems what he meant was, "any time the other team makes any adjustment whatsoever, I like to overreact to it."  Also, I question whether he truly thinks Ray Hibbert is actually the best rim protector in the NBA - if he honestly believed that, wouldn't he keep him on the court for the biggest defensive possessions of the game?  Also, the TNT cameras, with Pacers television crew Reggie Miller and Steve Kerr - wait, what?  They aren't the regular Pacers tv color analysts?  Wow...Anyways, the TNT cameras captured Vogel in overtime telling his team, "I told you we were going to win this game."  Then they lost.  So he lied to his own team, too.  He has no moral boundaries.

4) We already mentioned Bosh's huge three point play in overtime.  He was in foul trouble early, but bounced back with a nice second half, and finished with 17 points on 11 shots.  Efficient offensively.  And he was the reason Hibbert wasn't on the floor to defend KJ's last drive - Vogel said he didn't want Hibbert having to try to contain Bosh in space on the last play, although that was probably a lie, he probably did want that...But Bosh's backup was even more efficient.  Birdman Anderson kept hiding on the baseline, waiting for KJ James (triple double: 30,10,10) to drive, draw Ray Hibbert, then Bird would swoop to the rim, catch, and finish.  He made all 7 of his shots, the two huge free throws, scored 16 points in 18 minutes, grabbed 5 boards, and had three blocks.  The Heat won the battle of paint points 60-48.  A big chunk of that is KJ and Dwyane (a solid 19 on 9-15, 6, 5, and 3) getting in the lane, but the fact that Bosh and Bird both made "big" contributions was a "big" help.  Get it?  They're the bigs on the team.  It's super-late, sorry.

5) We already know Frank Vogel is a pathological liar, and that several Pacers, especially David West, are cheap shot artists.  They're a dirty team.  What we didn't know is that even their front office lacks class.  At the end of the first half, the Pacers' Director of Media Relations, David Benner, tweeted out, "If there is such a thing as Death by Public Address Announcer, I am experiencing it in Miami."  First of all: how dare you take a shot at Heat P.A. announcer Mike Baiamonte?  He's a Miami treasure, and his "dos minutos left in the quarter: dos minutos!" gave this blog its very name!  Second of all, nice job of media relations!  I would assume David Benner's job is to try to make the Pacers look like a professional organization (admittedly, no easy task).  Umm, oops?  Third, I'm sorry you aren't enjoying your time here in Miami - I know, I like Indianapolis a lot better, too.  There's a lot more to do, the weather's better, and there are only white people and no one ever says anything in Spanish!!!  Pandering to the Pacer fan base, I am sure.

6) I love Kevin Durant.  The kid is a great basketball player, and I hated to see him get bounced out of the playoffs so early.  Although, is it fair to point out that no one criticizes him for not having a post game, even though he is 7 feet tall, when before everyone criticized KJ James for not having a post game, even though he's 6'8"?  It's not fair?  Okay, never mind...This week, after the terrible tragedy in Oklahoma, KD gave one million dollars to relief efforts.  Wow - that is amazing.  Love you, KD, and respect that so much.  By the way, guess who didn't give one million dollars, or even one dollar, to relief efforts, as far as anyone knows?  You guessed it: the incredibly unlikable Russell Westbrook.  I, for one, couldn't be less surprised.  You know who else also didn't donate any money to relief efforts?  Frank Vogel.  Although he claims he did.
Settle in for a tough series, kids.  We'll be back on Friday for Game 2.  If you need me before then, I'll be using a loofah, trying to scrub this weeks-old Chalmers shirt stench off me so that I can go to work.  "I did not have sex with that woman!  It depends how you define what 'is' is!"