1) That doesn't, like, count, right? That's not one of the real Finals game, I don't think. Phewww, cuz we got smoked!
2) Play of the game: halfway through the fourth quarter, with the Spurs leading by about 60 points, and Miami having long since stopped playing, Tiago Splitter ducked in on the right side, caught a little pass, and shot a short floater at the basket. Chris Bosh was standing out of harm's way, directly under the rim, and as the ball approached he seemed to decide, "well, I'm standing right here, I might as well do something," so he reached up and politely goaltended the ball away...right back to a Spur on the wing, I believe Cory Joseph, who instantly whipped it to a wide open Danny Green, who rose up and ripped a triple through the net so hard that it almost snapped the nylon off the iron! And not just any triple: the Spurs' 15th triple, a new Finals record, en route to 16-32 on the night! Green made 7-9 and Gary Neal made 6-10. And it wasn't just about the shooting - the Spurs dominated every aspect of this game, pretty much all night long. It was the exact same game as Game 2 - except the complete opposite! Use 'em all up, Spurs; use 'em allll up!
3) I'm not even going to celebrate it, but Mike Miller made all five of his three pointers, and is now 10-11 in the Finals. Okay, you know what? I had a crappy day at Dos Minutos International HQs, worked until 9 pm, then flew home to watch us lose by 100 points - I'm gonna celebrate it a little: LET IT FLY, MIKE MIL-LAR!!! CORN PALACE FEVER!!! Okay, I'm done. Here's the problem: Dwyane Wade scored 12 points in the first half tonight, but he probably gave up 18. He's a liability on offense because he isn't spacing the floor, or finishing at the rim because of his injury. Also, every time he is out in transition, he makes the worst possible decision for whatever reason (tentative on knee) - his best fastbreak tonight was a play where he drove, jumped, turned, and threw a fastball into KJ's shins from one foot away (somehow KJ deadened it with his legs, picked it up, and finished). But he's an even bigger liability on defense. He can only either sell out on the closeout - come all the way, and pray the guy doesn't put the ball on the floor and stroll by him - or hedge all the way into the paint and give up triples. We all saw how that worked out tonight. He simply can not get into to the paint to show on the weak side, and still have a quick, controlled closeout back to the perimeter. Miami's defense is predicated not just on athleticism, but specifically, on King James and Dwyane's athleticism. If Dwyane is all of a sudden a minus - big minus - defender due to his knee against a team that moves the ball so crisply, and shoots threes so well, it's a monster-sized problem. Mike Miller is out playing him right now - but Mike Miller's probably not good enough to beat the Spurs in a series. That's the problem. If Dwyane can't do it, and it doesn't look like he can, there isn't anyone else who can (I know, I know - not even Mike Mil-lar). I don't have a problem playing Wade hurt, I guess, although it is frustrating in the moment. I don't think we can win anyways if he can't play better, so I'll go down with him - that's our dude, he's iconic. None of this exists without him - never forget that...I thought Spurs in 6 before the series, and I think Spurs in 6 now. If Dwyane were healthy, I think Miami would win. Seems pretty simple. If it was so easy to replace your second best player, we'd be playing OKC in the Finals instead of the Spurs...
4) Yo, everyone is going to be talking about this until Thursday, and I don't have much to add, but for posterity's sake, I guess it needs to be mentioned: KJ James played horrendously. He couldn't make a shot. The Spurs are giving him every open jumper he wants, he missed all those. Then, even when he got to the rim against the four defenders jamming the paint, he missed those. He got beat to every loose ball by Kawhi Leonard. And his defense gave in about halfway through the third quarter (along with everyone else). His three quarter-speed, backwards, dribble-handoff-six-foot-shovel pass directly to Cory Joseph (that dude, again!) during the Spurs explosion was probably the low point of the night. He hasn't scored 20 points yet in the series. People are like, "Kawhi Leonard has him on lock!" That's fine - it doesn't look that way, though, it looks like Kawhi Leonard is sitting down off him, with everyone else pinched to the lane behind him. And KJ just keeps missing. Leonard is killing him on the glass the last couple of nights, though - he's just outworking him. I have no explanation for KJ's play. The Spurs plan is sound. Dwyane Wade is hurt. Bosh couldn't knock down his looks tonight. But, honestly, for KJ? He needs to make some open shots. He made them all year. Bad time to miss.
5) Listen, Spurs fans. We all heard you mocking Heat fans at the end of the blowout by chanting "7 Nation Army," like we do in The Trip. We won't know if that is appropriate for you to do or not until tomorrow, when Indiana Pacers' radio announcer Mark J. Boyle rules on it, but until then let me just say this: Guess what? You can't hurt our feelings with that. You know why? Cuz it's already lame as hell, we are already like, 6-8 years behind the curve by doing it in Miami! Every European soccer club has already done it, discarded it as played out, brought it back for nostalgia, then discarded it again...years ago! You can't be lamer than us, Spurs fans! Go back to your stupid, half-baked rumba shuffle during player introductions that's been boring the entire state of Texas for the past decade and a half. At least we are lame with something that was cool, at some point!
6) I'm not saying this is a guarantee, I'm not totally positive about this, but there's at least a very real possibility that Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers is the son of Paul Simon of "Hello, Darkness, my dumb friend" fame. Right? Look at these two together:
It's kind of the same haircut, they're both white dudes, and they are right ages: Kiedis, in his mid-to-late 40s, Simon, what, probably 100? Simon would have rocked the ill facial hair as well, but you weren't allowed to do that when he was popular, back in the 1940s. I think I'm on to something. Kiedis can't sing, that's weird - but they do say that can skip a generation, you know? It's worth someone digging into a little further, for sure. Not me, of course, I mean someone else...
Well, Game 4 is on Thursday. It's tough to believe it could go a lot worse. Friday morning I go to Mexico for a week - that's not a joke, a lot of people thought I was making that up, but it's true. What, just because I spend 400 hours a year writing this stupid blog, you automatically assume that I wouldn't schedule a vacation during the NBA Finals? Umm, actually, you are right - I didn't; my mother did! Anyways, I think they have the internet in Mexico, so as long as I don't get kidnapped, I should be able to finish off the season from down there. Might be a little shorter - don't want to stay up too late, that attracts the banditos. If you need me before Thursday, I'll be looking for the bridge over the Heat's troubled water (hint: it's from South Dakota, has long hair, and wears #13). Try to shake this one off!