Friday, April 6, 2012

Grizzlies 97 Heat 82

6 Thoughts

1) The 17 game home winning streak is over.  All the positive momentum from the back-to-back midweek sweep of Philadelphia and Oklahoma City is over.  KJ James' most recent shooting and scoring tear is over.  It was a meaningless game to Miami (Memphis is fighting for a playoff spot), it wasn't close, it was incredibly boring, and I'm not gonna lie: I didn't really enjoy it.  Have to be truthful about that.  Let's get it over with!

2) You know what?  Maybe I'm the idiot.  To me, KJ still looks exhausted, Dwyane looks exhausted, and Chris Bosh looks like he's somewhere in between a coma and death.  Miami never led in this game, and never even made a serious run in the second half - never cut the lead to single digits.  Memphis is fighting for its playoff lives, and they are a very good team that came out focused, and scrapping.  It was the perfect night - the perfect night - to pack it in early, let KJ, Dwyane, and Bosh relax on the bench watching Dexter Pittman, Terrel Harris, et al, get pounded, laugh it off, and move on to the next one.  But there they were, still in the game down 20 with 3 minutes to go - at least KJ then didn't drive the lane and have 300 pound Marc Gasol karate chop him in his sore hand, sending KJ into writhing convulsions of pain.  Oh, wait - that did happen.  Great!  In all, Dwyane played 36 minutes, KJ 38, and Bosh 35.  To me it seemed stupid; maybe to everyone else, including Coach Spo, it seemed smart.  What do I know - I thought Columbia was part of Mexico until someone corrected me today and told me Columbia is its own country.  Wow.  Listen: Miami, the Bulls, OKC, and the Spurs are the best four teams in the league - you can figure that out by looking at the standings.  Miami and OKC have a pretty significant advantage in the playoffs over the Bulls and Spurs: part of the Bulls and Spurs success is predicated on the impressive depth of their respective rosters.  When those teams go to their benches, they don't drop off.  Over the course of the regular season, that's a big edge, but in the playoffs, that advantage is somewhat offset by the fact that Dwyane and KJ (for Miami), and Durant and Westbrook (for OKC), aren't going to play their normal 36, 37 minutes.  They are going to play 41, 42, 43 minutes - they aren't ever going to get to their benches, so the Bulls' and Spurs' edges in that area don't hurt as much.  Why Coach Spo doesn't think that this condition would necessitate getting Dwyane and KJ especially, some extra rest is mystifying to me.  He's a smart dude, so I know he is aware of it - I just don't understand why he doesn't think it's important to get the guys more rest...

3) Miami got outscored in the first quarter 25-12.  They turned the ball over 11 times.  Eleven!  That's almost impossible!  They turned the ball over every kind of way you can turn it over, including two different times on inbounds passes when they threw the ball directly to Memphis.  It was terrible.  It was really, really bad.  It made me laugh - that's how bad it was.  Bad.

4) Not only did we play bad, but this: no Johanna Gomez.  Normal (very pleasant) white girl doing the sideline reporting, including a pre-game interview with a very polite, if somewhat subdued, Zach Randolph of Memphis.  Still not sure of her name.  Who prefers the white girl to Johanna Gomez?  I mean, I'm not saying I have a preference either way, at all, I'm not saying I perk up a little (and so would Zach Randolph) every time JoGo does a sideline report.  I'm just saying I think she is an excellent, excellent sideline reporter who really brings a lot of knowledge and insight to the game.  And M.Minutos loves her - it's not really for me that I think JoGo should do every game, it's for M.Minutos.  Keep this quiet, but I think she might have a little crush on JoGo - shhhhhhhh!

5) One of the many, many employees at Dos Minutos International Headquarters opined today that she thinks KJ James looks like Bin Laden (reminder: President Obama waxed this dude).  I'd like to point out, first of all, that this young woman is not from here - she is from Eastern Europe, or Canada, or something. Also, surprisingly, not a Cleveland Cavaliers fan!  Second, KJ James does not really look anything like Bin Laden.  Third, we've covered this before, but I guess we need to bring it up again: I'm not even totally positive that former Chicago Bulls small forward Scottie Pippen wasn't Bin Laden.  Check it:

Know which one is which?  Psyche!!!  They're both Pippen, the second photo is from a mad-crazy costume party in South Beach a few years ago which Pippen and I both attended (I dressed up as former Atlanta Braves pitcher John Smoltz)!  You thought the second one was Bin Laden, right?  That's my point, that's how much they look alike!  By the way, I hate to see Scottie Pippen ran afoul of the law there in Houston, but at least he didn't murder thousands of people...that we know of!

6) From

"He did not say 'hey girl.' He said 'hey, watch out!" So says British journalist Laurie Penny, who tweeted on Tuesday that Ryan Gosling saved her from being hit by a NYC taxi when she was "not looking the right way because I am from London." Gosling apparently "grabbed her" before she could become an English-accented hood ornament.

One: obviously, Ryan Gosling would never say "hey girl" - he's not Donnie Wahlberg.  Two: I like how the 'savee' points out, like, "I'm not an idiot - I'm just from London."  Oh, got it.  Three: Ryan Reynolds has never saved anything, not even his own career (that's for GFOB Thor)!
Well, we will be back on Easter Sunday for a game against Detroit.  I can tell you now, expect a lot of resurrection jokes if Chris Bosh happens to play well, or a joke about nailing myself to a cross if he doesn't.  Until then, if you need me, I'll be wandering around out in traffic hoping that Ryan Gosling is down here on vacation.  Good luck on your Easter Egg hunts, everybody!